Ki11 me, Ki55 me
by s3v3n-d34d1135
Summary: Light's lost his memory, and apparently his mind. When L suggests he's only been fixated with him in the Kira case because he's been fixated with his beauty, Light sees a chance to prove he's innocent. Wait, wait, who said anything about sleeping with L?
1. Chapter 1

My first story, I would greatly appreciate a review, even if it's just "good work". I'm an attention whore, you see. Visit my profile if you like what you see, I will update regularly, I already have much of it written out.

I do not own Death Note, and it's possible you will recognize lines or plot devices from elsewhere, no infringement intended. Without further ado...

Ki11 me, Ki55 me

Some exposition: When Light gave up his memory, he gave up his Death Note, leaving it in Rem's care. It ended up in Yotsuba's possession, and before long it was recovered by the task force. But, what if Light had still been in confinement, and never touched it?

--

Matsuda opened the thick metal door, leading his boss' son inside, saying cordially, "Misa is in another room on surveillance."

Light Yagami nodded, his russet hair shifting before settling perfectly back in place and his lips slightly pursed to hold back his mild irritation. He walked into the cell, sending a quick glare towards the spindly Shinigami chuckling at his shoulder before turning to Matsuda. "I understand..." His lips twitched to a carefully perfected smile. "I'll be out soon, Ryuzaki will have to acknowledge my innocence after..." He glanced up at the camera in the corner of the room, his smile souring. "_This._"

Matsuda blushed faintly at the boy's smile, stuttering out, "I- I believe you're innocent, Light-kun, I'm sure it won't take long for Ryuzaki-san to admit that too."

L let a small smile mar his usually expressionless face. "Your son is impressive, Yagami-san."

Soichiro Yagami blinked at the comment, but nodded. "Thank you, Ryuzaki, I'm very... proud of my son." _There was a lot to be proud of... before this Kira madness..._. He was brought back from his musings when Light spoke again.

"Thank you, Matsuda." The boy smiled warmly before turning to the cot opposite the camera, picking up the white straightjacket there. He held it out towards the other man, grimacing slightly. "Would you... help me with this?" Matsuda nodded and began tying and buckling the various straps around the boy's back.

L watched this carefully, an almost invisible blush on his cheeks. "... Most impressive, Yagami-san." He lowered his voice, his eyes still glued to the young man being tied up. "I must remind myself to have Matsuda teach me his skill..."

Soichiro looked up from the screen, his eyes widened somewhat. He had always had some reservations about L's inner thoughts towards his son, but he had been sure that at worst it would have to do with his probability of being guilty. "Uh... so you can untie him later, right?"

Even more troubling, L paused before replying. "... Yes. Of course, Yagami-san." He still hadn't looked away from Light.

Matsuda smiled as he finished the restraints, stepping back and bowing slightly. "Alright, Light-kun, I'll leave you now. Keep your spirits up; L is sure to clear your name in no time!" With that, he left, locking the cell door behind him with a loud CLICK.

Light's face fell slightly as he sat down on the cot, leaning against the wall and shifting tensely. Even if this had been his own idea, he hadn't expected the straightjacket. Looking back, he should have known L would have insisted on it.

The detective watched for a moment before pressing the intercom button in front of him. "Comfortable, Light-kun?"

He hid the faint satisfaction that rose in him when Light started slightly before turning to the camera, his eyes narrowed in annoyance. "As comfortable as one can he in a straightjacket... How long is this necessary?"

"Thirteen days, so says the Death Note." L patted the plain black notebook on the table in front of him. "If deaths continue, your name is cleared. If not, you will become a major suspect and arrested to hold trial."

Light shifted, laying against the wall and said just loud enough for L to hear, "Fine... only thirteen day-"

L happily took a bite of cake.

Light immediately narrowed his eyes at the camera. "Don't eat cake right next to the microphone."

"Sorry." The circuit cut out.

For a moment, Light just sat and thought, and it was almost pleasant to have a moment away from everything and everyone that annoyed him, but he knew it wouldn't last because of two reasons. One: His mind being so extraordinary, he knew he'd quickly tire of having nothing to put it to good use to. Two-

"Hey, Light"

_... That. _

Light wouldn't have bothered responding to the Death God even if he _wasn't_ under L's surveillance. Instead he threw a quick but smoldering glare in his direction before closing his umber eyes and sighing softly, showing as clearly as he could that this was not the time for conversation.

As usual, Ryuk ignored this. "Oh, yeah, you're not talking." He paused for a moment, looking around the plain cell. ".... How's that plan coming along? Got anything big coming up?"

Light's lip twitched to a shadow of a scowl, and tossed his head, feigning getting his well-groomed bangs out of his eyes, but really nodding subtly to the door. Didn't the monster understand that this wasn't the time to disturb him?

Inside the surveillance room, L paused with a spoonful of strawberry sauce halfway to his mouth, watching the young man more intently.

Ryuk responded by laughing in his own strange supernatural way, like grinding gravel. "Want me to leave, right?"

No, I want you to sit down, get comfortable, have a glass of lemonade. Simpleton.

"But you humans are so interesting!" He grinned, saying, "You think this'll really work? L might see through the fake rule, you know."

Light pursed his lips, huffing softly. He had, of course, considered this. He was even now in the process of thinking through his next move, and he might have actually gotten things figured out if he could continue without being pestered.

Again, L's voice filtered in through the intercom. "Are you alright, Light-kun? You seem uncomfortable."

Light responded without missing a beat. "I am, this is going to take some getting used to." He adjusted his position again, now lying on his back, looking up at the dull ceiling.

"There is an alternative, you realize."

Light blinked, sitting up. "An alternative to being under confinement for two weeks? Why didn't you say so, what is it?"

"You'll simply be handcuffed to me."

"I'll be-...." The brunette scoffed, lying back down. "You have to be kidding me. Spend the next fourteen days in a quiet room, or spend them handcuffed to you? Do you even need to ask?"

"For surveillance purposes, Light-kun. Or else, if you have some other agenda you'd rather be attending to, you could just continue this lock-down as first planned."

Light sat up again, trying to contain his outrage. This was just getting ridiculous. Before he could retort, he heard his father respond, "R--Ryu-! That's-!" The brunette cut him off, his teeth gritted in anger, "What? So, basically, be handcuffed to you or else I'm Kira? Father, that's immoral, you have to agree!" He heard his father groan and could almost see him lowering his head into his hands, trying in vain to stop processing thoughts.

He could also picture L, hunched over in his seat, fidgeting his toes, shrugging as he said matter of factly, "It's up to you, Light-kun, no one is forcing you either way."

Light glared at the security camera. "But you'll still think that I'm trying to hide something, won't you?"

".... In a word, yes."

The younger couldn't help but groan, rolling his eyes. "Ugh, you're infuriating! You just hate losing, you don't even have any _proof_ that I'm Kira, believe me, if I was, you'd know by now."

"I wouldn't, actually, because Kira happens to not be an idiot. You are also not an idiot. And that's why, if you're innocent, you'll take me up on my offer so that you'll be able to serve your time in a slightly more dignified fashion."

Light continued to glower for a moment more before saying irately, ".... Fine, fine, I agree."

Soichiro grabbed the microphone from L's desk, "B- But-! Light, that's.... I mean..."

L interrupted him. "We'll get Matsuda to let you out then, Light-kun. And Yagami-san, please don't worry so much."

Light interjected, "I agree with him, father, it's better than being in here anyway." He narrowed his eyes, his voice slightly icier than before. "And _this way_, there are no disputes."

L responded in a business-like tone, "Agreed. Matsuda, let him out and get the handcuffs from my other desk." With that, he shut the intercom off.

Matsuda, who had just returned from the cell (bringing L his requested tea and box of sugar cubes with him), sighed before walking straight back out. He paused at a desk in the corner, withdrawing from the top-drawer shiny silver cuffs on a long chain. He walked to L's side, setting the handcuffs down before walking out the door, glancing back at L for a moment. _... What a weird thing to keep at an office._

A few minutes later, Matsuda unlocked the door and helped Light out of his bonds before leading him out. The younger followed, stretching his arms and shifting his shoulders. It had only been fifteen minutes at most, but holding still was more of a nuisance than he'd thought.

--

When they emerged into the front room, L was waiting, sitting in an armchair in his usual position, and twirling one of the cuffs around his finger. "Ready, Light-kun?"

Light grimaced slightly, sighed and held out his wrist.

L immediately snapped the cuff on, tightening it, then repeating the process on his own hand. Once completed, he looked up and smiled. "So it begins." He held up the plate of cake beside him, complete with fork. "Would you like cake, Light-kun? It may cure that frown."

Light marveled for a second at the immaturity of the statement before saying, ".... No, Ryuzaki, I'm fine. Let's just get on with the research. That is, _if_ you're researching _anyone else._"

L stared at him for a moment. He wasn't. Light didn't need to know that. "... I've deduced that Kira doesn't like sugar, Light-kun."

And the deductions begin. Lovely.

Light glared. "And how have you 'deduced' Kira's personal tastes?"

"By his personality. And according to his type of personality, there is an eighty seven percent that Kira doesn't like strawberry shortcake."

".... I'm going to bed."

L stood quickly from his squatting position, taking a step to the bedroom. "I will join you, then."

Light rolled his eyes, saying, "Oh, come on, Ryuzaki, you can unchain me to _sleep_, can't you?"

"I'm afraid I can't, Light-kun. Part of the twenty-four hours is the time in which you sleep." L paused, his black eyes on the younger man, blank as ever, but still managing to rebuke any arguments.

He watched his suspect pause a moment, mentally debating if he could possibly win this argument. Eventually, he sighed, "Fine, fine, I don't even care, just let me sleep." He massaged his temples, walking past his coworker/arch-nemesis to their now-joined bedroom.

L: 1 Light: 0

L followed, caught up to and walked past Light quickly, leading him into the room before pausing, looking at the bed. ".... I must admit, I don't usually sleep in beds, Light-kun."

Why should he care. It's the idiot's own fault for shoving them together.

"Then don't. Read, watch TV, work, just don't make too much noise." He sat down beside a plain set of folded sleeping clothes set at the foot of the bed and started to unbutton his shirt before pausing. He held out his cuffed hand to L. "Do you mind?"

L took his wrist and in the blink of an eye, the restraint was off, and immediately on again. Light blinked, he hadn't even had time to see what the other man had done. Was there a key? A weak point in the metal? It was only another second before Light noticed that in that time, L had slipped his sleeve off and the sleeve of the pajama top on.

His inner child seethed.... Damn ninja freak.

L perched on the space beside him, still watching. "All is well, Light-kun?"

The brunette looked up, his expression unchanged. "I... I suppose, yes." He pulled the black shirt the rest of the way on before moving to undo his pants. He paused again, looking pointedly at L. When the man gave no sign of complying with his unspoken request, he said, "Ryuzaki, would you turn?"

L paused, watching Light closely and for a moment. Light watched back. This psycho couldn't possibly deny him at least _common modesty_.

"Of course, Light-kun." With that, he turned, waddling around so he could stay in his chosen posture.

Light quickly finished undressing, pulling his pajamas on and pulling the bed covers back, laying down on the far size of the large bed.

L turned back after the sound of rustling blankets paused, fidgeting his toes. "Does Light-kun mind if I eat in the bed?"

Light turned on his side, facing away from the other and settling, instructing, "Don't get sugar, chocolate, frosting or whipped cream on me while I'm asleep and I don't mind."

"Light-kun is sour." The elder pulled a nondescript laptop from the drawer of the nightstand, opening it before setting it on the bed in front of him and starting it up.

"And you're probably diabetic from eating all those sweets."

"If thinking burns the sugar, I am not diabetic. I am healthy, whether that reassure Light-kun or not."

"I'm sleeping, Ryuzaki." Light reached for the switch on the lamp, flicking it off.

L shrugged slightly, leaning over the glowing computer screen and clacking away at the keys. Despite the sound and continued distractions from the computer, Light slept. L focused on the files and messages until he realized he was struggling to stay awake, his eyes narrowed to bring the garbled words on the screen before him into focus. Not long after that, he was asleep, the computer still in his lap, bathing him in pale illumination.

--

Hours later, Light stirred, opening his eyes and sighing softly. After a moment, his eyes strayed to the clock beside him. 4:15. Brilliant, not only was that damn detective interfering with his plans of world domination (_Salvation_, he said _salvation._), now he had messed up his sleeping patterns. Light glanced over his shoulder, slightly surprised to see L's eyes closed and his laptop screen dark from lack of use.

Oh, he would never get this opportunity again.

He sat up, glancing around the room before hissing softly, "Ryuk, get out here."

There was a moment of silence before the shinigami appeared above him, cocking his head like a pet. "Apple?"

The boy below him narrowed his eyes, his low tone conveying his irritation. "No apple. My memories. Take them now. I give up possession of the notebook."

Ryuk grinned, cackling. "Alright. I officially own the Death Note, human. I'd say good luck with whatever you're doing, but... I don't think you deserve it."

Before Light could snap at him, he was gone. The next instant, a bright white flashed in front of his eyes, and he almost jumped back. Before he could, he felt his body go limp, his mind go blank and he passed out, falling back to the mattress.


	2. Chapter 2

Wow, you guys actually like this. I'm... I'm.... AW, I'M SO HAAAAAPPY! Ahem. I said nothing. But thanks to everyone who reviewed, favorited, put this on alert, etc, etc, I love you all, and I replied to reviews. If you didn't get them, please tell me so I can just answer on here. I'm, uh, still figuring this site out, only got the profile a week ago.

On another note, I have a game for everyone to play. It's called 'What's wrong with this picture', and this is how you play. Cleverly hidden in this story are plotholes and inconsistencies. Tragic, I know. But I'm going to make a game of it and test you guys by asking if you can find them all. I have a list here, but I doubt I've found them all, anyone who can find one for me that I already have gets a cookie, and anyone who can find a new one... I don't know, request a one-shot.

As per usual, I don't own Death Note, or anything else you may recognize.

Ki11 me, Ki55 me

At precisely 6:03, L woke, blinking to clear his mind before adjusting and continuing his work as he'd left it last night. Before long the boy beside him opened his eyes, yawned softly and pushed himself up, rubbing his eyes. "Ow..."

L's eyes remained glued to the computer. "Is Light-kun in pain?"

"Just a headache." Odd, he hadn't felt sick when he went to sleep. Of course, it could have just been the fumes of sugar permeating the room all night. He stretched and stood, taking a step before he was jerked back by the cuff, groaning softly, "I'll have to get used to this."

L nodded. "Is Light-kun hungry? There is nothing downstairs but sugar, and since Light-kun obviously has such a distaste for it, we could go out for pastries."

"... I think the idea of leaving the house to go out because there's nothing healthy is somewhat superfluous if you're going out for sweets anyway."

"Pastries are not sweets. There is bread in them. And there would probably be hot chocolate or coffee coming with them too."

"Mm, that still rather defeats the purpose. How about _you_ have pastries, _I'll_ have normal food."

"Pastries aren't normal?" The detective stood, setting his laptop aside and walking out the door, dragging Light behind him.

The brunette pursed his lips and followed, internally cursing the utterly unnecessary chain between them. "No, they're not, they're sweets. I don't care if they have bread in them, I just want a normal breakfast."

_Why_ did this have to be the only way to prove he was innocent, shouldn't someone as intelligent as L just be able to know?

L shrugged. "Light-kun's tastes are strange."

He led them out of the room and down past the surveillance room where several of the men were working. Matsuda rushed out, speaking to the detective. "Ah, er, Ryuzaki, Misa-chan still doesn't know anything about the Death Note"

Light glanced behind him, up at the monitors and his eyes widened at the scene. "L, what are you doing to her!"

Oh, thank God that hadn't been him.

L looked over at him, his expression as blank as ever. "She was not offered the deal you were. I cannot keep twenty-four hour surveillance on two people at once. If you had declined the offer, I would have asked her."

Light's mouth fell half open as he looked around at the various screens. "That's... That's inhumane, she's a twenty year old girl!"

L shrugged uninterestedly. "She was arrested on suspicion of being the second Kira. This is the logical way to restrain her. With a power like that, if she is Kira, who knows when she could kill us, after all?" With that, he continued, pulling Light behind him and walking out the door.

Light followed, however reluctantly, his eyes still focusing on the screens behind him. "Yes, but you think I am too. Even in the cell, I wasn't retrained like that."

The detective shook his head slightly, looking ahead. "You were bound the same way, Light-kun. I imagine it feels very different than it looks." The pair left the building and L glanced up and down the street, musing, "Where is the breakfast shop...?"

Light sighed, "It's two blocks down, but-" He glanced down at the cuffs connecting them and quickly gathered the spare chain before pushing it in his pocket, glancing around to see if they'd caused a stir.

The elder looked at Light's actions with little interest. "Ah, yes, handcuffs connecting two men is not socially acceptable, is it?" He led them towards the restaurant, his eyes darting around at the surrounding buildings.

The brunette pursed his lips, following. "No, it isn't."

"Too bad for society, then." They entered the restaurant, sitting down in a booth be a wide window. Light sat across from L, letting the chain fall out of sight through the crack between the table and the wall. L glanced to the table edge. "That will be very inconvenient, Light-kun. The table support will catch it."

"We'll move it later, at least this way, no one can see it." Light flipped through the menu with little interest, setting it down with his uncuffed hand.

"... It is still inconvenient..." L copied him, leafing through the menu, taking a small sip of the water in front of him before pausing. "They have strawberry sundaes, Light-kun."

Light rolled his eyes before he could stop himself. "So they do. They also have _real_ food, Ryuzaki." The boy set the menu down, looking out the window.

At that moment, a young waitress to the table, smiling brightly. "Are you ready to order?"

Light looked up and nodded, but he barely noticed her. He ordered more than he probably would on a normal occasion, but with the overgrown crow hunched over in the seat across from him, he was sure he'd need the extra energy.

L looked up, starring at the woman unblinkingly. "Strawberry sundae. More than one strawberry, if possible." He gathered the menus with one hand, holding them out to her and ushering her away with his presence alone. He turned back to his companion. "Light eats a lot for being so pretty."

Light blinked, momentarily silenced.

Why would L say he was pretty. Why. Ugh.

".... Thank you, I think. But I am not 'pretty'."

He had tried to make this point clear before, _men_ were not pretty. Pretty was far too feminine a word.

"And as to why I'm eating more than usual, it's because I know the rest of the day will be spent going through endless files, each of which will somehow prove to you that I'm Kira. I think I'll need the energy."

Just to put up with you.

The detective nodded. "Then you understand now that I can eat so much sugar and not be diabetic." He fiddled with the napkin case with his cuffed hand, the links scratching against the table as he moved.

Light twitched, each tiny sound jarring his nerves and causing his voice to take on a slightly scathing tone as he said, "Stop that, you'll draw attention to us." He massaged his temple with one hand, taking a sip of water. This man was infuriating, why couldn't he just be _normal_ for a half an hour, it wouldn't kill him.

Unfortunately.

Bad thoughts, bad thoughts, if he knows you're picturing his death, he'll never let you hear the end of it.

"I apologize." L retracted his hand, letting the links grind roughly against the table edge.

Light flinched as he felt people looking over, though he couldn't share their confusion, he was too concerned with his own annoyance. He grabbed the links near L's hand, pulling the chair back under the table. "Ryuzaki, stop fidgeting."

L cocked his head, letting Light guide his hand lazily. "I am not fidgeting. The napkin case simply intrigues me." Before Light could respond, the waitress returned, setting their food down, nodding courteously and walking away.

Light responded with a polite 'Thank you' before picking up a piece of toast and taking a bite, pouring his desired amount of cream and sugar into his coffee.

L blinked, watching him. "Light-kun makes use of both hands, even at breakfast. That must mean he is good in bed."

Light had barely taken his first drink of coffee before he almost spit it out, dropping his toast to cover his mouth. He set down his mug quickly, eyes wide, his cheeks flushed a very faint pink. He swallowed, stumbling over his words slightly. "The- where the hell did that-"

L looked vaguely surprised, but Light could see amusement in his eyes. "It is simple observation and deduction, Light-kun. Those who remember where their hands are tend to be good at having sex."

He can't be serious.

Light felt his face flush and tried to force the color down, wiping coffee from his lips with his napkin. "You can't say things like that, Ryuzaki!"

"Why not? I think Light-kun would be very good at sex, because his body is optimal for it."

"..." Light blinked, starring at the man across from him. Somewhere, somehow, some tiny part of his brain was imploding. "..." He shook his head, cutting a pancake neatly and eating it more enthusiastically than one should be about breakfast.

L watched for a moment. "Light-kun retreats into the safety of his pancakes. But why?"

Light looked up, unable to hold back the glare he knew he was sending at the older man. "Because I do not wish to have a conversation with you over sexual talents."

"But it's a valid topic, isn't it?"

"_Why _would it be a valid topic?"

"Because we will be sharing a bed for at least twelve days, of course."

Light narrowed his eyes. He _hated_ being reminded of that fact and hissed more than spoke, "That has nothing to do with it."

L cocked his head. "... But sex is usually had in beds."

"Not. In. Ours." Light continued eating, now glaring at the man across from him with almost no control over his hostility.

"Why not?"

"Why would there be?"

Were they honestly having a conversation about this? They were both either very bored or one of them was going insane. And Kira knew which.

"I find Light-kun attractive."

Light blinked. Never mind. No question who was going insane. He cleared his throat before saying firmly. "Let me say again. There will be absolutely _no_ sexual activity in that bed for the next thirteen days."

"... Light-kun is grumpy today."

Light took a bite of toast to give himself a moment to think. "I'm not. I'm simply stating that I will not be having sex with you." He finished his toast, at least he'd have an excuse to leave soon.

"But you are still grumpy when you do that. Light-kun isn't eating his toast quite so neatly."

"It's exceedingly difficult to eat toast 'neatly', Ryuzaki." Light took a sip of his coffee, fighting the urge to fidget in his seat.

"Light-kun is taking bigger bites. You're in a hurry."

He was starting to loathe this man, being read so easily was infuriating. Since when was telling the truth his best option in a conversation? "Yes, yes, I am. I'm in a hurry to get back to your building and away from the public eye." He couldn't help but glance around the room, taking in the several occupants starring before looking back to L, heat rising in his cheeks. Being the center of attention because of unfortunate things like having a man attached to his wrist was a much different experience than being the center of attention because of his genius.

L cocked his head. "... Light-kun is blushing. Light-kun does not get embarrassed, so perhaps you actually do want sex with me?" The detective took a bite of whipped cream, his expression reverting to a thoughtful mask.

Light glared, the faint tinge on his cheeks darkening to what even he would consider a blush. "I do not, now kindly drop the subject." This must be what going mad feels like.

L blinked, saying matter of factly, "Light-kun is blushing even more now. You must have been aroused by what I've said."

The younger tensed, blush darkening. No. _This _must be what going mad feels like. "That is not a reasonable deduction!" Why was he snapping? Why was this stupid not-even-accusation making him panic like this?

"Light-kun is very red. Perhaps he wants to have sex right now."

He just couldn't win, could he?

Light felt his face flush bright red as he paused, refusing to take in the absurdity of the situation. After a moment he lowered his face into his hand, almost praying to wake up again. Surely this was not happening.

"Light-kun gets turned on very easily." L dragged the handcuff chain up to the tabletop. "Perhaps it is best that we return to the headquarters."

Light stood, restraining himself from seething, "I am not turned on, I'm just embarrassed!"

L cocked his head, blinking like a curious crow. "But Light-kun comes off as a person who is good at controlling his emotions, and thus is not embarrassed by something like sex talk."

Light rolled his eyes, silently wishing Kira would strike him down where he stood. It proved he was innocent and gave him a legitimate excuse to never speak to L again, two birds, one stone. Of course, he'd be dead, but at least he'd be right. "Oh, come on, let's just go back to headquarters."

To his minor surprise, L nodded and dropped several bills on the table before walking to the door, pulling Light behind him.

Light ignored the people gawking, shoving the excess chain back in his pocket and following L, the color slowly fading from his cheeks. At least that was over with.

Until L glanced at him, chewing on the thumbnail that strayed to his mouth. "As I thought."

Light almost didn't want to answer, but instead he narrowed his eyes, meeting L's gaze almost brazenly. "As you thought what."

L looked forward and continued lumbering towards headquarters. "Sexual innuendo, talk, or stares do not embarrass Light. However, he still blushes when he talks to someone about having sex with him or her. So you must have been turned on, and not embarrassed."

Light rose to the bait like a snake to its charmer, hissing, "I _was_ embarrassed! People don't tell me to my face that they want to have sex with me!"

"Why is that?"

"Because people don't do that." The brunette glared ahead. "It's rude."

"I think it's flattering when people say they want to have sex with me."

"I don't, it's not something people should say."

"... I see, because it makes Light-kun want to jump them?" L adopted a thoughtful look that Light couldn't quite determine if it was genuine or mocking.

Light's eyes narrowed and he walked faster, back towards the building that would hopefully return what little sanity L had possessed before this incidence. "It does not, I don't want to 'jump' anyone."

L kept up with him easily, saying conversationally, "That is unrealistic. All human beings have sexual desires. So you must want to have sex with me."

Light scoffed softly before he could stop himself. "You wish, if I could, I wouldn't have anything to do with-..." Light tensed slightly, glaring back at the detective and holding up his cuffed wrist. "There couldn't _possibly_ be an ulterior motive to me being attached to you, could there?"

"Light-kun is suspicious of me."

"I am, yes, the day after you handcuff me to you, you say you want to have sex with me."

"A persuasive deduction, yes." Light watched L stare off into space for a moment before he continued, "Perhaps... I wanted to have sex with Light-kun secretly, so I offered handcuffs as a sort of subconscious act. After all, I could have offered Misa-chan first, I did not... hm..."

Light groaned at the attempted rationalization of a truly simple human desire. "You-" he huffed, refusing to dig himself deeper and sped up.

L followed close behind. "Light-kun has brought up an interesting point, and it must be explored thoroughly."

"I'm sure it does," Light muttered.

L evidently heard him and nodded. "Light-kun agrees with me. Which means we must have sex."

Light felt his whole body and mind freeze for one instant and he stopped in midstride before continuing, speaking in a firm, commanding voice, "_No._"

L paused with him before continuing, his cuffed hand slipping to Light's side, stroking his hip lightly. "But otherwise how will we know what my intentions really were?"

Light jumped and repressed a shudder. What the hell did the man think he was doing. "Ryuzaki, don't touch me. And what exactly does it matter what your intentions really were, who cares?"

L cocked his head. "You care, because you asked." He poked Light's side again, finger trailing to his hipbone. "And this can be a sexually stimulating spot. It would use time effectively if I turned Light-kun on during the walk to my building."

Light glared, eyes narrowing. "No, it wouldn't, because we're not having sex."

L nodded once. "Yes, there is an eighty five percent chance that we will not have sex when we reach our quarters again." Contradictory to his words, he continued approaching the younger, standing behind him and putting his hands on Light's hips. "But if I touch Light-kun enough, maybe he will be turned on enough to consent to sex anyway."

The brunette jumped, his hands jerking to shove L's hands from his sides as his face flushed. "What do you think you're doing??"

"I am turning Light-kun on sexually, so that you will have sex with me."

Light opened his mouth to respond when the words died in his throat and he felt his face heat up. L had just _grinded_ against him, matching their hips far closer than he _ever _thought they should be. "Ryuzaki, get off me!" He shoved the pale hands off his sides, glancing up and down the street at the bystanders.

L cocked his head. "... Ah, Light-kun can control embarrassment against people staring and gets turned on sexually by me. But public displays are too much, perhaps?"

Light felt his nails dig into his palms and he near growled, "You do not turn me on sexually!"

"You blush and get flustered. That's just about the same thing." L wrapped his hand around the chain between them, shortening the distance and anchoring Light more firmly to him before he began dragging him more enthusiastically back towards his building. "We'll go back to our bed and have sex, then."

"No, we most certainly will not!" Light wrenched his wrist away, cursing under his breath, "There has to be another way besides the damn key."

To counter, L wrapped the rest of the excessive chain around his own wrist, pulling the younger man forward. "Light-kun isn't being very sensible."

"_I'm_ not being sensible? _You're_ the one who's dragging his suspect to his building to try to have sex with him!"

"Yes. What of it?" The building came into sight in front of them.

"So, that's entirely reckless, and besides that, I have no desire to!"

"But it will reveal if it was my intention to sleep with you, which is why I would be focusing so much on you, which would be a great factor in why I suspect you to be Kira."

Wait, what?

Light paused, blinking in confusion. ".... That actually makes sense."

The detective nodded. "Which is why we're going to have sex, and then we'll know if my suspicions about you being Kira are truly founded or not."


	3. Chapter 3

Hello, all, as promised, your update. I hope you guys like this, this is around where it started to give me trouble. As always, please review, and expect the next part on Wednesday. Oh, and if anyone here didn't see it, please read 145t P14c3 Y0u'd 100k (my first MattMello) story, hopefully of many. If anyone has an idea of how to continue it with plot, I'd be overjoyed to hear. Ah, and we're still playing 'What's wrong with this picture'. You can find the rules in Chapter Two's Author notes.

I don't own Death Note, but I did make a pretty cool necklace about it.

Ki11 me, Ki55 me

The brunette's lips twitched to a very slight smile, his tone slightly more relaxed. "On, no, no, no, no, no, that doesn't mean I agree to the sex, it just means that I finally know why you've always acted so obsessed with me."

L shook his head slightly. Just like the boy to think his obsession could only have to do with his brilliance. "It's not definite, whether or not I am sexually attracted to you. It might make sense, but it is not definite. Only a forty-seven point eight percent chance."

Light rolled his eyes. "You've propositioned me fifteen times today, L, you want me."

"I propositioned you because I wanted to find out if I wanted to proposition you, Light-kun." L pushed the door open, pulling his companion inside.

Light glared, following the older man reluctantly. "Then why don't you see a psychiatrist, maybe they can help you, but we are _not_ having sex."

The officers in the research room looked up at the pair simultaneously, all attention drawn by Light's comment.

Matsuda's mouth was open, his eyes wide. "... L- Light-kun... and Ryuzaki-san!?"

Light's eyes narrowed at L, scoffing, "He wishes."

L nodded. "Maybe."

Over at his desk, Soichiro Yagami was mortified.

L continued, "Which is why we're going upstairs to find out. You all need not watch the tape, I'll examine it later." With this, he dragged Light towards the stairwell.

"No, no, _no_!" The brunette stumbled slightly, leaning back against the other's grip, growling, "Father, Matsuda, doesn't _anyone_ else have a problem with this??"

Soichiro stood, saying with outrage, "Ryuzaki, please, this is completely unnecessary-!"

"Yagami-san, the reason I wish to have sex with your son is that, if it were true that I am sexually attracted to him, it would explain away my focus on him and perhaps clear his name."

Soichiro paused, torn between mutual desires.

Light hated how familiar the flush in his cheeks was becoming. "You don't need to sleep with me to find that out, why can't you just-"

His father lowered his face into his hand, much as Light had done earlier that morning, and spoke hesitantly, "... Light, it's up to you. I- I want to see your name completely cleared, so..."

Light fisted his hands by his sides, raising his voice despite his efforts to contain himself. "Yes, I want my name cleared too, but I am not going to _sleep_ my way out of this!"

"Why not? Are you sentimental about your first time, maybe?" L mused with genuine interest.

Light's blush darkened as he immediately opened his mouth to respond before he realized if he had to speak, he would scream. So, he stood his ground, fuming and glaring daggers at the man attached to him.

"If that is all it is, Light-kun can have sex with Misa-chan first. She likes Light-kun a lot."

The younger man reeled his temper in and snapped, "I don't want to have sex with Misa either, I'm not a sexual person and can we _please_ move this conversation away from my _father_ and my _coworkers_!"

This was a bad move.

L nodded quickly. "Okay." With this, he grabbed Light's hand, pulling him upstairs to their bedroom, ignoring his protests and continuing, "It seems strange that Light-kun would not submit to sex to clear his name. Even an innocent person should be willing to do that."

"I don't want to have sex with you, alright?" This was ridiculous, this was absolutely and completely preposterous and if you'd told him he'd be in this situation a few months ago, he would have given you a polite smile and walked away without a word. Light sighed, looking aside. "Why don't you just... I don't know, "soul search" or see someone about it, why do we actually have to _go through with it_?" He continued, muttering slightly, "And even if you don't agree to that, why can't you just kiss me or I can undress, see if there's any... " He pursed his lips, continuing delicately, "Reaction."

L nodded with understanding. "Ah, but if we did that and it did react, I wouldn't want to stop." He nibbled his thumb absentmindedly, plopping down on the edge of the mattress. "... Putting that aside, is Light submitting to a kiss or even discarded clothing?"

Light rolled his eyes to avoid looking reality in the face, blushing dark red. "Yes, I'd let you kiss me, and you've _already_ seen me naked in security footage, it's not like that will be anything new."

L paused, watching him. "... " Light tensed as the man drew him closed, tugging the chain insistently and resting his spindly hands on the younger man's hips. "Light-kun is blushing again. It's cute."

Light glared, squirming slightly and pushing the hands off his hips, taking a small step back. "I told you not to touch me."

L frowned up at him. "It's unreasonable to think I can kiss you without touching you."

Of course it was. Dammit, why did this little social reject make him feel like an idiot child.

Light sighed, sitting on the bed beside his suitor. "Fine, fine..." He tried to stay still as he felt L place a cool hand on his thigh for leverage and lean over before pressing his lips gently to his own.

It wasn't so bad. Then again, most moments that were supposed to be magical or horrific felt like nothing. A first touch didn't always bring fireworks and being looked over by a person you weren't interested in didn't always feel like a violation. And this was just skin pressed together, however intimate it looked.

...But still... it lasted only a few seconds, and it was almost pleasant. Enough to be tolerated.

Light almost didn't notice when L pulled back, and only barely heard him say, "Odd".

The brunette blinked, slightly surprised. "What? Nothing?"

L shook his head, settling back in a perch. "I can't tell." With no warning, he swept down again, this time pressing his mouth softly to Light's neck, moving closer.

Light sighed softly, almost with disinterest, leaning his head away to give L more access to the smooth skin of his throat. "Damn. This may turn out to be a little trickier than I hoped."

L's hand slid down his leg, fingertips just tracing his inner thigh as he trailed his lips up slowly, brushing the graceful jaw line and saying softly, "What is trickier, Light-kun?"

"I hoped it would be a simple peck on the lips-" Light felt L's nails scratch his skin softly and he jumped. "What do you think you're..."

L pulled back, his expression conveying polite confusion.

Light narrowed his eyes slightly, his modesty returning to him. "You don't need your hand there and why are you kissing my _neck_?"

"If I can't get good answers from your lips, Light-kun, perhaps other body parts will have a different effect. And my hand is there because it is inconvenient to support myself while leaning over you, and if it were not on your knee, it would either be between your thighs or on your other side, which would only be a more trapping measure."

Light pursed his lips, glaring slightly. It sounded so reasonable when he said it like that. "Then let me move back, and you can sit in front of me." The brunette pushed L's hand from his leg, moving back on the bed, making a conscious effort to keep his body relaxed.

L watched him with interest, turning to face him. "It would help if Light-kun leaned forward too."

It would have been so much more logical to agree, but that would be forcing him to _respond_ to this idiotic pseudo-experiment. Instead, he rolled his eyes, saying with mild irritation, "I'm laying back, do whatever you like. _Within reason_." He added quickly, lying back with his arms at his sides, suddenly feeling very confined.

L nodded, crawling forward over the younger boy in an almost animalistic manner, lowering himself carefully to press his body flush.

Oh God, Oh Jesus, Oh Kira, Oh Satan, Oh whoever-was-listening, this was the worst idea a genius mind had ever come up with. Despite Light's efforts, his body tensed.

He opened his mouth to... do... something, but he forgot what it was when L kissed him again, harder.

Ohhh, this was not happening. This was... was...

L pressed closer, his chest against the other man's, teeth and lips roaming boldly over Light's and just brushing his tongue over the pink lips offered to him, tugging lightly at his bottom lip as his hands moved smoothly to Light's sides.

_Ohhh..._

The brunette felt his body tense further as he covered up the momentary insanity by going on the alert, his hands fisting loosely in the covers below him. L thumbed his side softly, moving slowly down the other's body, pausing to suck at Light's pulse point, feeling the beat speed up.

Light flinched, biting his own lip softly and squirming despite himself as he pushed at L's shoulder firmly. "Alright, alright, you've kissed me. _Thoroughly_. Now can you please just make up your mind about whether or not you're attracted to me."

This had gone on far enough, he couldn't possibly be less than one hundred percent sure if-

L pulled back, looking down at Light with interest. "... There is a sixty-eight percent chance that I am attracted to Light. I am not quite sure yet."

Light couldn't help but groan, "Oh, come on, can't you- Mm-" Their lips were pressed together again, just hard enough to Light to jump, causing him to press closer to the thin hands peeking up his shirt.

Oh, no. No, no, no. He didn't agree to this.

"I must ask Light-kun if he is willing to discard his shirt."

Oh. Right. He did agree to this.

Light gave an exasperated sigh, undoing the buttons of his shirt. "Yes, fine." He slid the material off his shoulders, continuing until the sleeve got stuck on the chain still connecting them. They both stared at the obstruction for a moment before L's hand flexed, popping a joint from place and slipping the cuff from his wrist to let the shirt fall off the bed. Light blinked and the cuff was reattached.

"That..." He shook his head, grumbling as he settled on the bed.

L took his place on top of the younger, running his hands up Light's sides and thumbing the smooth skin before settling on his chest, kissing the brunette's collarbone before sucking softly, the skin heating as blood rose to the surface.

Light jumped, pursing his lips, fisting his hands and hating the goosebumps that rose where the damn genius touched.

L ducked his head before Light could admonish him, kissing his nipple and sucking.

No, no, no, it could not happen like this, this was _infuriating_, _humiliating_, absolutely-

The point of a hot tongue dragged over the sensitive skin, fondling enthusiastically to accompany the fingers tracing over his ribs, down his sides and moving inward to circle his navel with short rounded fingernails, exciting a slight shudder.

Oh, it could _totally_ happen like this- No, it couldn't!

Light banished his libido from his mind and pushed up on his elbows quickly. "L, that's enough!"

L blinked, cocking his head in confusion. "But I still don't know either way... And besides, Light-kun is already aroused, isn't he?" His eyes flickered down at the faint bulge in the other man's pants.

Light sat up, ignoring the latter comment, saying firmly, "I don't care anymore, I agreed to a kiss, I gave you a kiss, I agreed to shed clothes, I shed clothes, _nothing_ else is happening." He turned to hide his blush, leaning off the bed to snag his shirt on two fingers, straightening and pulling it over his uncuffed arm.

L pulled at the chain, reminding Light forcibly that they were still connected. "I warned Light-kun. If I were aroused, I wouldn't want to stop, bit if I can't even find an answer, then I am even less likely to give up." He leaned forward on his knees, kissing the crook of the other boy's neck lightly, his hand wandering to the tensed thigh beside him, then up to the slender hip.

Light jumped beneath him, slapping L's hand away. "G- get off."

He stuttered. This was not alright, this had to stop _now_.

The brunette turned over, not wanting to look the other man in the face as pushed up on his knees, straightening his clothes and attempting to force the blush off his face even though he could feel it spreading over his cheekbones.

"Light-kun, you shouldn't be blushing so much. You'll faint." L slid an arm around his waist, his chest pressing against Light's back and pushing the man down, matching their hips. "Don't hurry away. I don't have an answer yet."

Light tensed the moment he hit the blankets and he pushed up, trying to jerk away from the body behind him, gritting his teeth and growling, "I told you, I don't care about your answer, get off of me this instant!"

He must have sounded more panicked than he meant to, because L frowned, pausing. "... Light-kun, please calm down. Nothing bad is happening to you."

Light scoffed, craning his neck to look over his shoulder, voice soaked with sarcasm. "Oh, of course not, the man who's trying to get me locked away is just molesting me!"

"Light-kun, I do not wish for you to be locked away. Actually, I would hope you were not Kira, because I do not want you to get the death penalty." But whatever he said, he was still holding Light down.

The younger rolled his eyes, lips twitching to a scowl. "That's probably true, you can't touch me if I'm dead." He began to push himself up, fighting against L's weight, but it was more difficult than he'd thought it would be.

"Actually, your intelligence is what really intrigues me, Light-kun. Your body is very nice, but my previous comment about it was only one in passing, because I don't think about it so much. You are perhaps my first friend, and that is why I don't want you to die."

That old load of crap, the last time L had talked about being "friends", he took Misa into custody. And if L could lie, so could he.

"Yes, yes, and I enjoy being your friend." Light squirmed, managing to sit up, L still half draped over his back. "I'm not so fond of the idea of being your lover."

The detective cocked his head curiously. "Lover? No one said that, Light-kun. I'm simply trying to figure out if I'm sexually attracted to you of not. If I were, it would be disappointing, certainly, but I still want an answer."

Find a fucking answer.

Light glared, his irritation peaking again. "Fine, then exactly what more could you possibly need to know if you want to have sex with me?"

L frowned, pausing. "I'm afraid I don't understand your question."

The brunette pursed his lips, aggravation mounting further as he said curtly, "Are you sexually attracted to me or not."

"... I don't know. That's why I've been doing these things to you."

"How can you not know after all of that??" Light trailed off into grumbles, pushing L away to move to the edge of the bed, unclasping his pants and pulling them off quickly before he could second guess himself. He could feel L's mild surprise but tried to ignore it as he lay back, glaring icily at the older man. "_There_, now do you want me or not."

L blinked, frowning slightly. ".... Again, I don't know. Light-kun looks ready to stab me, so I have to say I'm not attracted, but at the same time, I'm probably simply not attracted because Light-kun is glaring like that."

Light sighed, wishing he could pretend this wasn't happening. Instead, he leaned to the side, picking up his tie and knotting it around his eyes before laying back. "There, now you can't tell."

He felt L watching him. He felt the radiating body heat as the crawled over him, and he felt the soft peck placed on his lips. "The answer is most definitely yes, Light-kun." And then lips down his chest, accompanied by a wash of warm breath with L's low voice saying, "Ninety-eight percent, I believe."

Great idea, Light. _Blindfold_ yourself and lay down on a silver chain platter. Perfect.

"Good, now let me-"

L's hips were pressed roughly to his, and angular fingers massaged his nipples.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter four up. Thanks to all those who have reviewed and favorited and so on, those kept me going last week. Anyway, here you are, I hope you all like it and I hope you're all in the mood for a little citrus. grins Oh, and I'd like people's opinions about what to start after this fic. There's still a hell of a lot to go, maybe... two thirds or so, but I'd like to get a jump start.

Sooooo.... light hearted wacky LLight and leading into MattMello AU or slightly more dramatic and serious but with funny moments LLight AU? Tell me what you want, and I'll put it up.

As usual, I don't own Death Note, if I did, those handcuffs would have been put to much better uses.

Ki11 me, Ki55 me

"A- Ah!" Light wasn't proud of the almost yelp that escaped his lips, but he didn't have time to regret it as he shoved against L's chest and his other hand darted up to yank of the makeshift blindfold.

He was stopped by a strong grip on his wrists before both arms were pulled above his head and he felt the excess chain wrapping around his wrists, fixing them to the headboard. Light's whole body tensed as reflex took over his limbs, jerking them against his binds. "What the hell-??"

"Sorry, Light-kun. There was a miscalculation. I wish even less to stop now than when I did when I was looking for an answer."

Light jerked violently, turning his head away and trying to jar the blindfold from its place. "I don't care, let me go, L!"

Where the Hell was Kira when you needed him?!

He calmed slightly as he felt L's hand tug the tie down gently, his soft tone an obvious attempt to calm the younger. "I don't mean to scare, Light."

He wasn't scared.

"I will not rape you, or anything nearly so drastic."

As if he could. Wait, could he? L was stronger than he looked, and with the cuffs- Stop thinking about it.

"But I do wish you would consent to me."

Light shook his hair out of his eyes, glaring up at the detective, saying firmly. "I don't want to sleep with you. I've told you a dozen times."

"Why not, Light-kun? Sex is pleasurable."

Light hissed his response, "I'm aware of that, I just have no desire to have sex, and I don't see why _you_ do."

"Because I like Light-kun a lot." He continued kissing downward, hands petting comfortingly down the brunette's sides until they reached the hem of Light's boxers, pulling them down slowly. "You don't need to do anything either, Light-kun. And it won't be unpleasant in any way, because I'll give you oral sex."

A cool hand traced up his length.

TIME OUT PLEASE.

Light's umber eyes widened, his face flushing red as he jerked his legs closed. "N- no, that's really, really not necessary!"

L looked up with interest. "Light-kun is getting strangely flustered again. I think he actually wants oral sex but is just not imposing enough to say so."

"No, _really_, I don't-"

The detective looked Light's body over before he bowed his head and dragged his tongue up the hardening shaft. He kissed the tip softly before sucking it into his... almost painfully warm mouth.

Light gasped, fighting the shiver that ran down his legs as his hips pressed almost subconsciously forward. "A- ah..!"

The elder rocked his head lightly, tongue swirling around the sensitive slit as one hand stroked soft skin rapidly and the other pressed up and down Light's inner thigh, massaging softly to quiet his soon-to-come protestations.

"Sto-" Light closed his eyes tightly, biting his lip to stifle a reluctant moan as his legs spread almost of their own accord.

L lapped at the underside perversely, consuming more before starting a rhythmic bob, his hands gripping the other man's inner thighs, spreading them slowly.

Light realized he was panting quietly, but was unable to stop it, even the tugs at his arms seemed half-hearted to him and he dimly registered that L's bobbing motion was being exaggerated to his senses as he was rocking his hips in time. "L..."

The detective gasped softly, his back arching further as he hummed in his throat, almost a purr. He pulled back, licking the base of underside, all the way up to tip, kissing and sucking on way.

This has to be illegal.

The brunette was panting heavily, his back arched and his muscles quivering in their attempt to stay still against the feeling. L did something absolutely sinful with his fingernails and the younger man groaned, throwing his head back and splaying his hair across the pillow beneath him.

L continued bobbing his head, his tongue swirling avidly as his hands slid under Light's thighs, moving them up to grip the man's hips and pushing them up.

The man beneath him cried out softly, a shudder tearing through his body. "G- God-!"

It seemed so wrong to be saying that, let alone... _moaning_ like he had to admit he was, but what the hell else was Light supposed to do when the detective was pushing his shaft further into his wet mouth, a low moan sending vibrations thrumming through him. L was rocking against him insistently, the tip of his tongue digging at the slit almost roughly.

Light moaned, no longer caring how his hips rocked urgently into the other's mouth, or how he gasped and jerked under the ministrations, his back arching.

"A- Ah-...!" Oh God, Oh God, Oh God, he was shaking, his legs tensing on either side of L as sharp nails dug into his palms. "Ah, Ah-!!" Light's body bucked and his muscles tightened, the heat coiling in his stomach before suddenly surging through his body from his fingers to his toes and into L's waiting mouth. "AH-!" His vision flashed white.

Distantly, L pulled back, swallowing and licking up the shiny fluid from the sensitive skin, a slightly satisfied look on his face as he watched Light's body splayed out before him.

Light couldn't blame him, even with his mind fogged as it was; he knew what this looked like. His chest was heaving as he panted to catch his breath and his flushed skin was covered in a thin sheen of sweat. Even with the picture he knew he was painting, it was a little nerve wracking to watch L stare down at him like... like... goddammit, what happened to the part of his mind that made analogies? Was that the part that imploded earlier? No, wait, that was his sanity.

Oh, who the hell cared anyway. He closed his eyes.

From above him, he heard a low voice musing, "... Sixteen... perhaps eighteen percent chance that Light-kun would approve cuddling. Perhaps twelve percent that he would approve more sexual activity..."

Light sighed, mumbling tiredly, "What's the other seventy percent?"

"Thirty-five percent chance that Light-kun really didn't want sex and will do something drastic. Seventeen percent chance he will get up, get dressed, and tell the others I was joking and eighteen percent chance that he will do something unknown."

Light rolled his eyes, pulling himself up slightly, greatly hampered by his still-chained hands. "Why would you have done anything if it was most likely that it was rape and I'd hate you forever?"

"Because it was most likely not rape. It was most likely something besides rape. There was just a good chance because Light-kun is so good at hiding what he really wants."

Okay, so that was true. But whoever said telling the truth was necessary.

"Tch, you _chained me to a bed_, L. If it wasn't rape, what was it? 'Nonconsensual sex'?" The brunette lay back, finally catching his breath and closing his eyes with a sigh.

"Those are the same things, Light."

"Exactly." Light tugged at his wrists pointedly. "On that note, let me go, I'm starting to get sore."

L blinked, glancing up at the headboard. "Ah, right." He leaned forward, unwinding the cuff carefully. "I apologize." The detective sat back on his haunches, finally allowing the brunette up.

Light sat up, rubbing his wrists and scooting back to lean against the headboard.

L plopped down on his back, looking up at the ceiling with mild interest saying softly to himself, "Thirty-two percent chance of cuddling, twenty-two percent chance of continuance, and thirty-six percent chance of something unprecedented."

"Make you a deal, you get to choose which of those you want, but I get to take the cuffs off."

L paused and shrugged. "Any one is fine. I've done too much today, Light-kun, I think you earned the choice. And I like the handcuffs."

Light pursed his lips. "I don't, they're uncomfortable." He raised his arm, turning his wrist and watching the sun glint off the metal.

Hm. Shiny.

"Nevertheless." L rolled over, staring at the wall. "... Light-kun, I'm hyper now." The detective crawled forward to the nightstand, pulling a boxed cake, a plate, a knife, a serving knife and a tiny fork from the drawer.

Light rolled his eyes, pursing his lips, no longer surprised by this behavior. "You're very predictable." With this, he lay down, turning on his side away from the older. "Don't spill on the sheets, or on me for that matter."

"I wanted to tip a little whip cream on you and innocently lick it off, though."

Light narrowed his eyes, refusing to look at the other. "I'm fully aware."

"Light-kun is very intelligent. It is partly why I like him."

"Hm." He closed his eyes.

Just go to sleep. So what if it's nine in the morning.

Something cold fell on his cheek and the brunette jerked, his eyes snapping open as he brought a hand up to wipe off the drop off whipped cream from his cheekbone. "Dammit, L-"

A strong grip pulled his hand away and L leaned down to swipe the offending drop away with his tongue. "That was accidental. But now I know Light-kun tastes better with whipped cream than pastry."

Light pursed his lips, frowning slightly and turning away from L's mouth.

Mmm... L's mouth...

Okay, stop that.

"I bet. No more 'accidents'."

L stuck his tongue out before going back to his cake. "Light-kun is lying next to me. Does that mean he has chosen the cuddling option?"

"No, I haven't chosen an option yet."

"Is Light-kun conflicted?"

Light blinked, looking up at the detective. "Conflicted about what. Whether to sleep with you now or not?"

L looked back at him, licking frosting from his fork. "Does that mean Light-kun will sleep with me eventually?"

Light paused, looking up at the elder with an unreadable expression. On the few occasions he'd been stuck in a problem he couldn't solve, he'd normally ask someone he respected for their opinion. But lately, the only person he respected enough to ask about something like _this_ was...

"... Well, why should I? As a genuine question, what reasons would you give?"

L chomped the cake from his fork. "It is pleasurable, and I have no STD's. And there is no reason not to."

"But I'm your suspect in a murder case. If I was Kira, I could take advantage of the situation and try to make you fall in love with me."

"It would make no difference, Light. I would still put Kira in jail, even if I loved him."

... Why did that make him feel...

Light felt his lips twitch to a small smile. "That's good to know, L... for some inexplicable reason."

And it really was. And he didn't know why.

L cocked his head, mildly confused. "Why is that? Many would call it a very dismal way to think. I find it refreshing, but not many others do."

"I don't know, but for some reason, it's reassuring." The brunette turned again, getting comfortable under the blankets, substantially more relaxed even though no actual answer to L's question had been reached.

The was a short pause before L said, "Light-kun, I'm very tempted to snuggle without your consent."

Light raised a brow, looking over his shoulder. "Do you ever need my consent?"

The younger detected a very slight glare in L's eyes as he countered the jab. "Light-kun is very stubborn. I did not hear a very clear 'no' from him, so I assumed he was just being difficult"

The brunette pursed his lips, pausing. He shrugged, keeping his face blank.

L wilted slightly. "I hope I did not mouth-rape Light-kun..."

"..." Light blinked and laughed, smiling softly. "It wasn't rape, mouth or otherwise, I'd agree on that much."

L perked, licking crumbs form his fingers. "That is very good. But I will trust Light-kun to not be stubborn when I ask to cuddle."

Why is he acting like such a romantic, this can't be normal for _any_ twenty something year old male, let alone a weirdo like L. Maybe he was over-thinking this. No, he was just being careful. Oh, right, he was supposed to talk to L.

"... I suppose just for a minute."

L set his now empty cake plate aside and wrapped an arm around Light's waist, pulling the other man up against his own body, burying his face in the tan skin of his neck and inhaling his scent.

Light started slightly at the sudden movement, tensing. ".... What are you doing?"

L pulled him closer, his chin rested on the other boy's shoulder. "Light-kun smells better than cake."

Light closed his eyes, ignoring the cake comment and wrapping his arm over L's.

Oh, what the hell, let him cuddle or snuggle or whatever he wanted. This was okay. This was nice. L was relaxing against his back, his breathing evening and his grip slackening.

Light blinked, looking over his shoulder. "Don't you dare fall asleep."

L closed his eyes, saying softly, "Light-kun is comfortable."

The younger glared, pointing a warning finger in L's face. "You are _not_ going to fall asleep and leave me here to explain what happened when my father bursts in."

L lips turned to a small smile and he pushed Light's hand away softly. "I won't, Light-kun. I rarely sleep, because I never feel like it. This is simply relaxation."

".... Good." The brunette settled, looking forward.

There was a moment of silent between them.

"I'm not Kira, L."

L nodded. "Okay."

"I know you don't believe me." Light shrugged, tone slightly disappointed. "Alright, alright, it's not like there's much I could say to convince you."

"There's no point in arguing about it, Light-kun. I could say I believe you if it would make it better for you."

"Not really, but oh well." Light looked over his shoulder at the older man. "Did this change anything?"

L nodded slightly. "I wasn't lying when I said it would change things if I found that I was attracted to you. There is a far less than a one percent chance of you being Kira-"

REPEAT THAT PLEASE.


	5. Chapter 5

Hello, everyone. This is a rather important chapter for me, it contains my first written out sex scene. Of actual intercourse anyway. Anyways, I'd love if people would give me some heads up on what they thought. Oh, and we're still playing What's Wrong With This Picture. Come on, guys, you obsessive Death Note fans out there _have_ to be able to see some of these. Or, I guess if you don't, good for me, I have no plot holes. But still. Anyway, I'm rambling.

I don't own Death Note, but I do have Mello tied up in my room. Don't ask me what I had to do to get him.

Ki11 me, Ki55 me

"Wait, what?"

L blinked, looking down at the other man. "Did you want me to say you are completely cleared?

"You mean I am?? But-"

"I _said_ the chance of you being Kira was lessened considerably."

Light sat up straighter. " 'Considerably', I should say so!"

L watched him for a moment before nodding. "... Yes, 'considerably'. There's only a very small chance now."

That was it. That was all, he didn't have to convince anyone else, this was _it_, L was the only one whose opinion mattered at this point.

".... That's... a wonderful relief." Light lay back, smiling slightly.

L cocked his head. "Why would you worry about that, Light-kun?"

"Because I didn't want you to believe I was evil."

"Light-kun isn't evil. I don't like people I think are evil."

Damn, if this is what sleeping with L got him, he should have jumped him the first time he met him instead of going through this whole drama.

Light smiled softly, momentarily happy with how things had turned out. "Good." He even settled slightly closer to the man behind him.

Why did this seem way too happy?

The detective seemed mildly surprised. "Light-kun is not being stubborn."

L was right. He wasn't. Why was this bugging him so much? What was wrong?

Light answered, though his mind was still wandering. "Because I'm happier." It was true anyway.

The elder paused, adjusting his arms around the brunette and saying, "Light-kun seemed almost angry to be accused of being Kira, but I didn't know being almost absolved would make you happy."

"Neither did I, but you have to see how it would be a relief that I don't have to..." Light sighed, pursing his lips. "I don't know, I guess it makes me happy that the others won't think I might be working against them secretly."

L nodded, his eyes straying down to the gleam from Light's wrist. "... Out of curiosity, will Light-kun allow the handcuffs to continue?"

Light blinked before looked back, his eyes narrowed. "I wasn't aware they were strictly necessary."

"They're not. Can they continue anyway?"

Why was he even surprised? Damn pervert.

"I... guess? I mean, for a little while. But won't the others wonder why I'm still wearing them?"

"We could tell them that I like them for sex."

"... Yes, but see, that would be one of the things I wouldn't want them to hear."

Anyone to hear. Ever.

".... Hm." L frowned, annoyed. "Societal rules are complicated."

"I suppose so, yes, but they do generally need to be followed."

"Everyone should just... eat cake."

Light paused. He looked over his shoulder at the elder, face blank.

L met his stare. "What?"

"... Cake does not solve every problem."

"It could."

"No, it couldn't. Cake doesn't stop murders or rapists." Light paused, looking ahead. "Or vending machines."

"Vending machines are not on par with murderers, Light-kun."

"I acknowledge that, yes, but people have managed to be killed by them before."

In fact, in the last year more people had been killed by vending machines than wolves. How did he know that anyway?

"There is no cure for idiocy, Light-kun."

"... Touché."

Life was too easy these days. So many ways to avoid Natural Selection.

"There could be a justice system for it, though."

Hm, that could be a good idea.

"We should look into that," Light mused, looking up at the ceiling. He blinked, suddenly feeling slightly awkward. "I just realized... I felt that you were..." He licked his lips, continuing carefully, "Aroused by me earlier, and I arrived, but you never did."

L shrugged, saying conversationally, "Even I don't masturbate in front of others, Light-kun. That goes beyond societal rules."

Light rolled his eyes, shaking his head slightly. "I was only asking if..."

Was he actually going to do this?

Yeah, he really was.

Light continued, "If you wanted me to help."

L's gaze locked with his, more heated than the brunette had seen before. "I would be ecstatic, Light-kun."

Light blinked at the sudden enthusiasm, feeling a faint blush rise in his cheeks. "How should I...?"

Did he really have to say it?

L's gaze dropped briefly, running down the younger man's body. "If you felt up to it, I would like to enter you. But if you aren't yet comfortable with anal sex, other forms of stimulation will do just as well."

"You can... enter me, I'm up for it."

Had he just said that?

The detective smiled, leaning down and kissing the other man's forehead before pressing him down softly to lay back on the mattress, moving over him and pressing their lips together.

Apparently he had.

Well, no way to stop once you've started a freefall.

Light returned the kiss hesitantly before pulling back. "I'm supposed to be... on my back?"

L nodded, settling on top of him "I'd like to enter you this way, so I can kiss you."

"... You're a bit of a romantic."

It was unexpected. Another layer to L. How odd.

"... I'm L. This is simply logical, I can do more things this way."

Light felt his lips twitch to a smile. "You're also a romantic."

"... I'm logical."

Light shook his head. "Whatever you say, are we doing this or not?" He draped his arms around L's neck, his fingers toying with the tips of L's black hair.

The detective nodded, bringing one hand to his mouth and slicking two fingers with a coat of saliva. Slowly, as if not to startle the man below him, he moved his hand to the back of a tan thigh, sliding it down gently to brush his fingertips to Light's entrance.

Oh God, Oh God, why did he agree to this.

L pressed one finger in carefully, circling it slowly as he watched Light's eyes widen and felt his body tense. He leaned down, kissing up the younger man's neck and saying calmly, "Tell me if it hurts too much... It would be illogical to be stubborn about something like this."

Light swallowed, his body still tense. "No, it isn't bad... it just stings." He started as he felt the digit inside of him-

Something was inside of him, something was inside of him

- wriggle, moving just a little bit deeper.

"Good." L's other hand moved lightly over the brunette's shaft, teasing the skin before wrapping his fingers around it.

Mmmm, better.

Light's breathing hitched as he felt his hips arch up and he anchored his hands more firmly around L's neck. "Ah..." A second finger edged into his body, and even though L's dexterous hand was palming his head in the sweetest way, and even though the man was licking and teething his nipple lightly, it _hurt_. "O- Ow."

The detective's hand stilled and the pressure eased for a moment, the strokes on the younger man's length moving smoothly as L kissed up to his mouth, delving his tongue into the inviting mouth below him, groaning enthusiastically.

"L-!" Light's body relaxed, his hips jerking slightly as he returned the kiss.

This was... tolerable.

L broke the kiss, his breathing heavy across Light's skin it ghosted across his ear and down his throat. The long fingers inside the brunette started pumping again and the detective ran his thumb over the sensitive perineum.

The younger groaned, leaning his head back to bare his neck and bucking his hips. "Ah...!"

Ohh, that was good.

Light licked his lips, shifting his hips and said with concealed trepidation, "You can... I'd like more."

Ugghh, note to self, never say that again. To anyone. Ever. Or in your head. That's right, even in here. Why are you continuing this conversation when L's-

Oh, fuck.

The digits inside of him twisted, pushing deeper and wriggling.

Light heard his own voice cry out.

Ohhh, fuck.

L kissed him softly, his voice husky. "That?"

The brunette was panting softly, grinding his hips down and shuddering as long fingers pressed in him relentlessly. "Yes, that."

The detective spread his fingers gently, edging in a third and humming contently as he ran a hand up and down Light's length, his fingertips fondling the sensitive slit.

A loud moan tore itself from Light's throat as his hips jerked into L's touch, one hand sliding down the pale chest to tease the detective's nipple with his well cared for fingernails.

He felt L shiver as he pumped his fingers slowly deeper, pushing and pulling and pushing and pulling-

And fucking pushing and pulling, and FUCKING PUSHING AND PULLING, could they get _on_ with this already!?

L pushed his hips up, grinding his erection against Light's and younger man moaned loudly, his body desperate. Nails dug into the detective's skin as their hips were ground together.

"L, please-"

Oh dear God, he did _not_ just hear himself beg. At least L cut him off with a kiss.

Mm, if you absolutely have to be interrupted...

Light returned the kiss eagerly as L slipped his fingers out and aligned their hips, the head of his shaft pressing to the younger man's entrance.

The detective pulled back quickly, saying softly, "Tell me to stop if it hurts."

Right. This was supposed to hurt, wasn't it?

Light nodded anyway, spreading his legs slightly and adjusting his hips carefully to get more comfortable. The brunette gasped as he felt L press inside of him, spreading him and...

Oh, Oh God, _Oh God_...

"Ah-!" Light threw his head back and shouted, his back arching to press their chests together. Now there's no talking, now there's no _thinking_, this is just- just-

Just L wrapping his arms around him and pulling him close, squirming his hips and carefully pushing himself deeper into the tight body beneath him, his well disguised muscles trembling. "A- ah... Light-kun..."

"Nn..." The younger bit his lip, panting softly and struggling to keep his breathing even as his muscles were forced to slacken. "A- ah-"

But this wasn't all bad, this could even be okay... if that stinging burn would go away.

L moved against the resistance carefully, pulling away and thrusting gently back in, starting a slow rhythm and trying hard not to force too roughly. The detective groaned softly, running a shuddering hand over the beautiful form beneath him, down to the brunette's erection, gripping it and stroking hard.

Yes, yes, yes, this was _totally_ worth the pain.

Light moaned softly, his breathing shallow, and he realized he was rocking his hips back and forth. He swallowed hard, letting one hand drop from L's shoulder to run up his own chest and push his sweaty bangs from his eyes. His hand continued its path up, slamming against the headboard and gripping it tightly. "Ah, L-!"

The detective's movements gained force and speed at the brunette's shout, pulling half out before thrusting back in, one hand continuing to pump the younger man's shaft as the other fondled the hot entrance, pressing a fingertip in alongside his erection, his own voice adding to the din that was undoubtedly scaring at least a few members of his staff.

Light cried out, his body jerking wildly as he ran the nails of his spare hand up and down the detective's spine, clawing passionately as his own chest heaved. "God...!"

He distantly heard the man above him moan, almost yelping, "Ah- ah... L- Light-kun...!" before he was slammed into almost violently and he felt liquid explode inside of him.

"A- Ah, AH!!" The brunette was quivering, and he couldn't even care enough to stop it anymore. His body bucked and his grip on the headboard tightened painfully, wood digging in under his fingernails as he felt his entire body tense taught as a bowstring until he snapped, shouting his voice raw. "L!!"

The detective moved his hand up the other man's shaft, catching his release on his fingertips before bringing it to his pale lips, licking the liquid off and saying breathily, "... Light-kun... tastes better than cake..."

Light blinked as his body relaxed, clearing his mind and blushing dark red before closing his eyes and saying softly, "Better than cake?"

L carefully moved his hips back, pulling out of the younger boy and scooting down to lay his head on Light's stomach. "Much better." He ducked his head, licking up the younger man's shaft to clean the last traces of semen. "Mm..."

Light shuddered at the vibrations on the even more sensitive than usual skin, biting his lip softly. "L, I need to... sleep..."

He felt the detective rest his cheek against his abdomen and his breathing even out, and he imagined by now L had closed his eyes. Within a few moments, the brunette's body was equally limp, his chest rising and falling evenly.

L smiled against him, sighing softly and settling.

And they slept together.


	6. Chapter 6

Hey, all, here's chapter six. I need your guy's feedback about some of the sexxing, cuz.... well, the way I have it laid out, there's gonna be a lot *more*. So, if everyone's happy with that, cool, if not, I can skip some of it. I mean... it's a *lot* of sex. Oh, and I'm a little worried I overdid the internal monologue thing in this chapter. I like it, cuz in my world it's Light's overthinking that gets him into a lot of weird situations and... well, personally I think it would be really awesome if Light actually did daydream like that. Anyways, I'm rambling, so...

I don't own Death Note, and Mello got away from my living room. Sulk. Oh well, I'll get him back. I always do.

Ki11 me, Ki55 me

An hour later, the door clicked softly, opening an inch.

Matsuda's nervous face peeked in cautiously. "Uhm, Ryuzaki-san, Light-kun, were you two going to have lunch, or-" He froze. The door slammed and footsteps retreated rapidly down the hall.

"RYUZAKI-SAN RAPED LIGHT-KUN!!!"

Light jolted awake, sitting up and blushing bright red as he heard Matsuda retreat. "Matsuda! No, wait a second!" The brunette stood, yanking the bed sheet around himself and dashing for the door.

He was wrenched roughly back by the chain around his wrist.

GODDAMN THIS ABOMINABLE CHAIN TO THE DEPTHS OF HELL!

L looked up, cocking his head at the door. "... That is unfortunate. Your father will be very displeased, I should think."

Light felt his cheeks heat further as he yanked roughly against the bind. "Take this off this instant, I have to explain what happened!"

Oh, he did not want to think of his father hearing about this. He didn't even want to think about _this._

L watched him for a moment in silence before pulling the cuff off and dropping it, saying simply, "There."

Light grabbed his clothes, pulling them on much less carefully than he normally would before shoving the door open and running after terrified man. "Wait a second, Matsuda!" He glimpsed the elevator door closing and heard an unintelligible shriek. The brunette's eyes narrowed and continued past the shiny metal doors to the stairwell, almost running down, his hands clumsily buttoning his shirt. "Dammit, dammit, dammit!" He paused as he got to the first floor, calming slightly when he registered no one was screaming yet.

But, just to double-check...

Light walked to the investigation room, peering around the doorframe. "Uh, Matsuda wouldn't happen to have come in here, did he...?"

His father looked up, brightening. "Light! Um, no..."

Light sighted, relaxing slightly.

Soichiro's face fell slightly as he continued awkwardly, "H... how did it go...?"

"Oh, nothing, nothing. I mean, fine, it went fine, I just need to... "

Find that overgrown child before he ran in here screaming like a little girl.

The chief frowned, standing. "Light? What?"

"Nothing, really, father. I just need to... find Matsuda, straighten something out, pardon me." The young man retreated quickly, sighing as he wiped his forehead. "Oh, thank God."

At least one thing hadn't been entirely screwed up yet.

"YAGAMI-SAAAN!!!" Matsuda raced down the hall towards the door.

_Why_ did he have to add 'yet', _why_?

Light snatched the man's arm, pulling him away from the door. "Oh, no, no, no, my father is _not_ hearing about... _that_!"

"B-but- Ryuzaki-san... and you- AAH!"

Soichiro stepped into the hall, observing the scene apprehensively. "Er, Light? What's going on here?"

Light slapped his hand over Matsuda's mouth, glaring at him, saying emphatically, "_Absolutely nothing_ is going on." He watched Matsuda blink at him, dumbfounded, and slowly removed his hand, saying calmly, "Are we alright now?"

"... I'm very confused, son,"

Matsuda looked to his boss, to Light. "I-I... " To Light's father, to the boy he just saw enjoying gay sex afterglow. "I d- don't... I'M SO TRAUMATIZED!!!" He bolted down a side hall and out of sight.

The was a brief silence before Light removed his fingers from his ears, sighing, "I expected that to be longer."

"Light, what in the world is going on?!"

The brunette glanced away and after a moment, he muttered in a rush, "I had sex with L."

Soichiro blinked, his mouth falling open. "Wh... w- well, what about your name? Was it cleared?"

The brunette nodded, still not meeting his father's eye. "I'm free."

"Then that's good!" The older man smiled brightly, though he was visibly put-off. "Th... so... there- was there anything else to... say? I mean..."

God, this was so awkward, it was physically painful.

"Uh, not really, I guess... " The boy shrugged, his cheeks heating up. "I guess he just assumed his fixation with me had to do with the case..."

"Er, that's... okay..." Soichiro continued warily. "Then, Light... sorry if this seems insulting, but..."

Oh, that couldn't be followed by anything good.

"I mean, you two have... been intimate, so... is there anything going on between you?"

Being a genius really was a curse. He didn't want to have to think about that kind of thing.

Light shook his head, massaging his temple to ward off an oncoming headache. "No, no, we- that was just..." He sighed and said curtly, "I don't know, we didn't really talk that much."

Soichiro pressed on, "But... Ryuzaki is attracted to you-?"

A calm voice floated from behind them as the detective appeared. "Yes, Yagami-san." L's dark eyes turned to his past-suspect. "Light-kun, you didn't come back, so I followed."

Light tensed, glancing to his father and back to the detective. "Right, well..."

Soichiro turned to his son. "Come back?? As in, to _bed_?!"

He was afraid of that reaction.

Light lowering his flushing face into his hand, growling, "I'm talking to my father, L."

Who talked about seducing a person when their parent was _right next to them_??

L cocked his head curiously. "... Yes? My eyes are functioning properly, Light-kun."

"I don't think he wants to hear about this!"

"... Will you come back to bed if I stop talking?"

The brunette sighed, his shoulders slumping as he groaned, "Father, I apologize for this."

Soichiro's face was hidden in his hands. "... Light, I'm not even processing anymore."

"You're lucky then."

"... Is it alright if I let you two talk and... get back to working?"

"With all due respect, yes please."

L watched Soichiro hurry down the hall and disappear into the screening room, before turning back to his companion. "Will you come back to bed now?"

Light felt his face flush dark red and he walked quickly back to the elevator, pressing the 'up' button and grumbling, "I can't believe you said all that in front of my father!"

L bit his thumb thoughtfully, following close behind. "There was a ninety percent chance that he would stop all brain functions and go away, though. And he did."

Oh. Well if you _broke his brain_, that's alright then, isn't it?!

Light rolled his eyes, scoffing softly, "You and the percentages, what is the percent chance of us having sex again?"

"Light-kun is still angry, so it was lessened. But because he has asked that, it is up to forty percent."

The younger blinked, looking at the man beside him.

Forty percent?

Really?

He would have guessed... fifteen or twenty at most.

... Was he a slut in L's mind? Well, it's not as if he could have done anything, with the handcuffs and the blindfold, and...

Maybe he should have played harder to get.

"Forty percent. There's a _forty_ percent chance that we're going upstairs and having sex again. Why."

L nodded slightly to the elevator, saying simply, "Because Light-kun is going upstairs again, presumably to heed my request of going back to bed. Otherwise, Light-kun would have no reason to go upstairs. And Light just asked the question of sex, which has brought up the topic. However, this is just speculation, so it's only forty percent."

Light considered this and countered, "But I'm tired, I still have to shower and rest, and we already did it twice today and it's not even noon."

L cocked his head. "Human males can orgasm six times in thirty-six minutes, Light-kun."

"..." The younger blinked. "... Please never try to prove that."

L shrugged as the elevator dinged softly and the door opened. "Light-kun's reasons are unfounded."

The brunette stepped inside, rising to the argument. "It is not, you're the one who's trying to get me into bed again."

The detective nodded, following. "But Light-kun enjoyed it. Or else he wouldn't have offered the second round."

Light narrowed his eyes as the elevator door closed. "I didn't-..."

... Oh come on, even _you_ know that's a lie.

"... Alright, yes, I did, fine."

The detective shrugged. "Forty percent, Light-kun."

Light's lips pursed. "One day, you will explain to me how you determine all your percentages." The metal doors opened and the younger walked out quickly, back down the long hall to their shared room.

L ambled after him, biting his thumbnail and thrumming the fingers of his other hand on his jeans. "This is why it is preferable to have chains instead."

"Why?"

"Because then Light-kun could be pulled back to bed instead, and I could make his stubbornness go away again."

The younger man felt a familiar heat rise in his face and glared to cover it up. "Like you need the cuffs to do that, you pulled me places before you put those on me."

L nodded, tapping his thumb on his lips, saying thoughtfully, "Then perhaps cuffs aren't needed to have sex with Light-kun. This is a new concept." The bedroom door loomed ahead. "Will I be able to have sex with Light-kun again, or will I have to make him not stubborn again, though...?"

... Was it more troubling that the idea of sex without handcuffs was new to L or that he was musing out loud over whether or not he'd have to seduce him?

... No, both, both, guess they tie.

Oh, he's still expecting an answer.

" 'Not stubborn'? I'm always stubborn."

L watched the younger man with concealed amusement. "Light-kun gives in to sex when he's aroused though." Light pursed his lips, rolling his eyes as the blush on his face darkened. "Light-kun is turned on by talking about sex, too. Perhaps if I keep talking about it, he will even offer first... hm..." The detective opened the door, walking inside.

"..." Light followed him grudgingly, rebuking, "I do _not_ get turned on by sex talk."

"But Light-kun blushes darker when I talk about touching him intimately."

"That's because you're talking about touching me, those are completely different matters!"

Yes, it did so make sense, shut up, logic.

The older man cocked his head. "Sex involves intimate touching though. Quite a bit of it."

I SAID, "SHUT UP", LOGIC!

"Yes, but-... Oh, stop making sense!" Light stormed to the dresser, picking up a plain comb and smoothing down his hair.

He heard L approach, and the detective rested his chin on the younger man's shoulder. "Light-kun shouldn't do pointless things like that. It's only going to get messy again." A cool hand slid up his thigh to his tightly clothed ass, squeezing lightly.

Light jumped, his body tensing as he pushed the detective's hand off, flushing faintly. "Stop that..."

L's other hand slid around him, gliding up the plane of his chest smoothly, fingertips rubbing a nipple softly. "Light-kun is being stubborn again. He's blushing."

The brunette started, jerking back on reflex before he realized it only pressed his body closer to the detective's chest.

The older man crossed his arms over the Light's chest, sliding his hands down to opposite thighs and massaging the flesh. He glanced at the younger man's face from the corner of his eye. "Light-kun hasn't stopped being stubborn yet. I wonder why."

Light gasped softly, feeling his body shudder as L's hands moved over him and he bit his lip softly to hold back a groan.

"Ah, it worked finally." He pulled the younger man sharply against himself; pressing their hips flush and stepping slowly back towards the unmade bed.

Light stumbled slightly, licking his lips and saying reluctantly, "We've already done it twice... I don't care if a _normal_ human male can come six times in thirty-six minutes, I'm not used to it."

"Light-kun _should_ be, his body his perfect for sex." The detective sat, guiding the younger man into his lap and wasting no time in running his hand down to the front of form fitting pants, massaging the hardening length.

The brunette felt his back arch subtly and he fisted his hands in the covers on either side of the older man. "A- ah-" Light cut his soft moan off by saying in a rush, "Why is my body... meant for sex?"

... Why would he ask that? Was he a masochist? Maybe just insane?

"It's slender enough to comfortably grab the hips and provide leverage. And the backside is _very_ attractive and devoid of excess body fat so entry is more pleasurable." The detective trailed his lips up the blushing man's neck, continuing, "And it's even better tasting than cake."

.... Those were pretty good reasons.

Light lowered his shoulder slowly as he kneaded the covers with his nails like a cat, his breathing hitching as the detective worked relentlessly at the skin of his neck with his tongue and teeth.

L undid the catches of the younger man's pants, slipping them from his hips and refamiliarizing himself with the smooth skin on the younger man's thighs. He gave a rough bite to the juncture of Light's neck and shoulder, eliciting an arousing mewl from the beautiful brunette in his lap and distracting him from being lifted momentarily so L could undo and rid himself of his own pants.

Light's body jerked as he felt himself being pressed down slowly and his eyes widened as L entered him again, as gently as the first time. He cried out despite himself as L squirmed his hips, pushing in persistently as he wrapped an arm around his chest.

Stop this stupid fighting, you _love_ it.

No, I still have my pride.

_Pride_ is keeping you from enjoying this? Then get rid of it right now.

Why did he continue arguing with himself when _so _much more important things were going on?

L rolled his hips up, rocking deeper and groaning softly in time as they moved together, running his deft hands over the rapidly heating flesh before gripping the brunette tightly, laying back and rolling them over.

"L-!" Light quickly adjusted to the change of position and gasped as he felt L thrust into his body to the hilt, his hands fisting in the covers beneath him as heat and _want_ spread through his body like fire, and he panted for breath as sparks shot down his shaking arms.

L's breathing was shallow as he moved again and again into the irresistible, prone body, working deeper and pressing his chest to the brunette's back, taking note of the fluttering muscles under tanned supple skin. One hand glided up Light's side, over his shoulder, up his shaking neck to the soft lips that L knew so well by now. He pushed two digits into the hot inviting mouth, exploring briefly.

"Mm-" The younger man jerked back slightly at the intrusion, his eyes wide as he moaned despite himself, his tongue flickering over the pads of the detective's fingers.

Ohh, this was good.

L was pulling out and thrusting back in with such a perfect rhythm, Light couldn't help but move his hips in time, swirling his tongue around the long pale fingers that were pumping in and out of his mouth suggestively. His body felt filled with electricity, every inch overwhelmed with feeling, all but his fingers. They were numb from their near impossibly tight grip in the sheets.

There was still a thought, why was there still this nagging feeling in the back of his mind...


	7. Chapter 7

Okay, everyone out there seemed to have absolutely no problem with more mindless sexxing so there you are. I swear it's almost over though. For a while. And then there will be plot! Yeah! Remember plot? That whole giving-up-the-notebook thing? ... Yeah, me neither, it was way too long ago, I don't have that kind of attention span.

Don't own Death Note, if I did, L would have taken _full_ advantage of those cameras ;3

Oh, and a shout out to TheIncredibleMsO, who is really cool and made me feel like an actual writer.

And everyone here should read frnight's story, Hacker of the Past.

This is a long author's note.

Ki11 me, Ki55 me

... Eh, who really cared?

The fingers slipped from his mouth, sliding down the same path they had taken, leaving a thin trail of saliva behind them. L's hand strayed to Light's entrance, pausing his thrusts to trace the tips over the hypersensitive skin before pressing the two lubricated digits inside. The detective groaned as Light's muscles contracted with pleasure, pressing around him tightly "Ah- Light-kun...!"

The brunette threw his head back as he was stretched further, grinding his hips back roughly, trying to calm his breathing. "L, God, God-!!" He was burning, his mind was screaming for more, for less, for _anything_ to make this... what did he want again?

At least he wasn't the only one losing control. Even through the haze that he couldn't seem to shake off, he felt L's movements become more erratic; the detective's usual veneer of complete composure was gone.

The older man was slamming into him, harder, faster, deeper, as he panted for breath, his wild hair sticking to the perspiration on his neck. "Light-kun-!" His fingers slipped out of the tight heat surrounding them, moving quickly to the brunette's erection and pumping it roughly, his hand slicked with precome, saliva and sweat.

Ohhh God, Oh God, OhGodOhGodOhGod.

"AH-!" Light's eyes closed tightly, his body jerking uncontrollably as his hips bucked, pushing L's length deeper until it touched a spot inside him _just right_... "L!!"

Everything felt good, his whole body was an erogenous zone, L's breath brushing over his neck, his hair tickling his shoulder blade, the very air on his skin was making him shiver uncontrollably. It paled in comparison to the feeling of L thrusting inside him roughly, heat surging into him. He may have screamed. He wasn't sure.

He barely registered that L had come, even as he felt liquid fill him. In all fairness, he hardly had the time to take it in, a second later, he was on his back and L had pulled out, moved down and taken his erection in his mouth.

The brunette's eyes widened as L bobbed his head, moving his tongue around the younger man's slit, mimicking what Light had done earlier to his fingers. "Mm-!!" This time, Light knew he _did_ scream, even if it was muffled by the hand he slapped over his own mouth. His hips bucked urgently, his hand twisting in the sheets as ecstasy rushed through him like a hurricane. "MM-!!"

His body arched. His mind went blank.

L pulled back, swallowing and sucking gently as Light panted, moaning softly with each breath and rocking his hips almost subconsciously.

How many times was that now? Once? Seven?

Oh, right, three.

That was a good number. Three times in... what, three hours?

.... What did L think he was doing with his mouth?

The detective had continued bobbing his head, lapping at the velvety skin, his fingers straying back to Light's entrance, still slick with semen, fondling and pinching the skin softly.

Light opened his eyes, pushing up on his elbows, still shaking slightly. "L, don't you da- ah-!" His hips bucked even as he tried to sit up.

L pulled back reluctantly, looking up at the younger boy. "Light-kun is being stubborn again." He dragged his tongue up the underside, drawing the pink head into his mouth and sucking harshly.

The brunette bit back a shout, gritting his teeth tightly, glaring down at the older man as growled, "L, I'm _tired_, I don't have this kind of stamina, I need- Ah-!" Light threw his head back, arching his spine.

This was _not_ what he needed right now.

L moaned against the tip of Light's arousal, his _excruciatingly_ talented tongue prodding the slit repeatedly, the finger circling his entrance finally thrusting in, pushing in and pulling out rapidly. "Light-kun needs no stamina..."

... No matter how good it felt, this was _not_ what he needed.

... But it _did_ feel pretty good.

Light was gasping, lying back on the mattress, his eyes closed tightly, one hand fisting in Light's black hair, tugging softly as he felt the satisfaction that had only just faded from his previous orgasm mount again. "Ah-..." The brunette's body tensed as he spread his legs wantonly. "H- Ah-!" A convulsion tore through him and his shaking hand tightened its grip in the detective's tresses. "L!!"

The older man pulled back, swallowing the liquid offered to him, almost purring as he slid the finger from the heat of Light's body. He kissed the tip, licking his slightly red lips, saying in a low, almost husky voice, "Light-kun is especially scrumptious when he comes."

The brunette could barely hear him, his body was limp and shaking, his eyes closed and his pretty face flushed dark red.

L blinked, watching him. Perhaps he had overdone it. The detective stood, disappearing from the room for a moment before returning with a glass of water. He perched on the bed, hooking one hand under the brunette's neck and pulling him up into a sitting position, offering the glass. "Here, Light-kun."

The younger man opened eyes, blinking the last fog from his brain before glaring icily, taking the glass and downing it, having finally caught his breath.

"... Once Light-kun has recouped, could we do it again?"

"No, we could not! I'm _exhausted_, I've never come this many times on one day, it's ridiculous!"

"... I can no longer tell if Light-kun is being stubborn of not... " L cocked his head. "Was Light-kun a virgin before today?"

Light narrowed his eyes, pushing up to sit and dragging the sheet over his waist. "Not of your business!"

_There's_ that attitude. He didn't think it was possible to lose a part of your personality through sex, but if anyone could...

".... Light-kun was a virgin... but with his popularity, that makes little sense."

"Who said I was a virgin!" The brunette stood, pulling his clothes on for the third time that day.

He was. But it's not as if he had to tell the truth about every little thing. Or _any_ little thing. And besides, he could have slept with any person he wanted to.

"Light-kun is not denying it, and he is dodging the question." L hummed thoughtfully, ignoring his state of total undress. "Which leaves the question of why."

Light pursed his lips, looking down to clasp his pants. "Because it's not your business."

"If I was Light-kun's first, I'd like to know. It would make me very happy."

The facts we have: Light was a virgin. Knowing that L was the one who took his virginity would make L happy. So, the question, did Light want him to be happy? Hm. Nah.

"Not your business," Light repeated in a clipped tone, buttoning his shirt.

"... Please." The detective reached out one hand, tugging Light's sleeve.

Tch, as if that was such a big deal. L saying 'please'.

....

Hm.

Light glared, pulling his sleeve away and straightening the cuff, saying irritably, "Why should I, I'm exhausted and I'm exceedingly cranky right now."

"Why? People are not usually cranky after sex."

"They are after _four_ times in one morning!"

"... No?"

"... Yes."

"But sex is nice." L pouted, his shoulders falling slightly with disappointment. "Unless Light-kun really doesn't like sex and I _did_ rape him, which would be dreadfully unfortunate..."

... Not this again.

Light rolled his eyes, sitting on the bed and laying back, his umber eyes closing. "I'm tired." There was a moment of peace before Light flinched, feeling a cool hand smoothing down his hair as if petting him. He opened one eye, looking at the detective above him and batting his hand away. "What the hell are you doing?"

The detective smiled softly, not so much laying back but letting himself rock back, still in his perch position until he sprawled back, his arms crossed under his head.

Light blinked, pausing as he watched L. After a moment, he shook his head, releasing a tired sigh, and relaxing into the mattress. After a moment, the younger man sat up, stretching and saying in slightly more businesslike tone, "Alright, we should get back to work, and I mean it."

L looked up at him, blinking. "But since Light-kun is no longer a probable suspect, we have no other leads."

"Which is why we have work to do, we still have to find him." Light stood, going to their dresser and picking up his comb, fixing his bed-head hair and grumbling, "Third time today..."

"If Light-kun would not be so stubborn, there would be a forth."

No fucking way.

The brunette rolled his eyes, setting the comb down. "Oh, come on, you can't possibly have the energy to go _again_."

He'd later realize that his mistake was challenging L.

"... Light-kun is doubtful. Why?"

"Because this is exhausting! How could you possibly go again!"

Light wouldn't be doing this for a _while_, his throat hurt from holding back moans, his back hurt from arching, his muscles hurt _everywhere_, more especially in his... pelvis area. Because L did _not_ stretch him uncomfortably far. Shut up. Why was he trying to justify this to himself anyway.

"... Light-kun forgets the sugar. I am constantly thinking; so much so that I burn off all the sugar I eat. My endurance is phenomenal."

... Would that actually work? Does that make sense? Hm, if you take for granted that thinking really _could_ burn off sugar, all that energy going through a body at once, assuming that L had a naturally high metabolism anyway...

Let's just not get into it.

"... I'll take your word for it."

"But I would so much more enjoy demonstrating to Light-kun first hand."

"I'm sure you would." The brunette sat back down on the bed, keeping the detective in his line of vision. "But then I'd pass out." He stretched his legs, circling his legs to work the soreness from

He actually might, with how little energy he had after the last round.

"... I think I would like making Light-kun pass out. But then I would have no more sex."

Light blushed, smacking himself in the forehead and massaging a temple. "You must be kidding." He looked up, snapping, "I will _not_ be unconscious in your presence!"

He wasn't _that_ much of a masochist.

L looked up at him hopefully. "I would tell Light-kun of the proceedings later."

"I'm not worried about that, I'm worried about waking up naked, covered in whipped cream with you standing over me licking your lips!"

Bad mental image.

"..." The detective wilted sadly. "That is a fear of Light-kun's?"

The brunette's eyes narrowed cautiously. "Shouldn't it be?"

"It is the opposite of a fear for me..." L's eyes slid out of focus before snapping back, saying with slight disappointment, "I would enjoy it if Light-kun did that to me because he is so sexy."

... True, he was.

"..." The younger sighed, rubbing his eyes to cover his pink cheeks and lying back on the bed. "I don't like surprises."

L looked up, his eyes wide. "It would no longer be a surprise now, so does that mean I can spray Light-kun with whipped cream and wake him up with a stare?"

.... He looked so _hopeful_...

"... Only if I pass out."

This was not a good side of him. He was giving in to a lot lately.

"Which I will _never_ do."

Another challenge that really shouldn't have been issued.

The detective's hand snapped out, grabbing his wrist and springing forward to straddle him. "One more time before Light-kun passes out, correct?" He leaned forward, pressing their lips together softly and pinning the younger boy's wrists above his head.

Light's eyes widened and he turned his face away as he felt his face flush as red as his lips. "No- I was joking, I'm not passing out-"

"Light-kun would say that to get out of another round." L shifted the brunette's wrists to hold them in one hand, the other sliding down his chest to the hem of his pants, inching them off as he trailed his lips down the tanned throat.

Yeah, he was just screwed. Pun intended with extra sarcasm.

"I- " The younger gasped softly, his back arching as he fisted his hands in the crumpled sheets beneath them. "A-ah..."

The older man nuzzled the crook of his neck softly; hot breath washing over his skin. "Light-kun was just being stubborn again." His spindly hand wrapped around the younger man's shaft, thumbing the head as he nipped at the already pink skin of his collarbone.

"No, I w-" Light's hips jerked up into the dexterous fingers and he tried to keep his legs shut even as L wedged his knee between them.

Goddammit, _one_ more time, then he was cutting this damn nymphomaniac off.

The brunette sighed softly, biting his red lower lip, closing his eyes lightly and reluctantly baring his neck.


	8. Chapter 8

Okay, so.... I swear we're _almost_ out of the sexxing for a while. Anyways, I'll be interested to see what you guys think of this one and I can't wait for this week to be over. Not only will that mean no more AP tests, but I'm also going to Supercon in San Jose this weekend. Should be pretty awesome.

No, I don't own Death Note, we all know if I did, it would have ended with L and Light eloping.

Ki11 me, Ki55 me

The detective reveled in the little involuntary jerk of the younger man's hips as he pushed his pants down and stroked the heating shaft more rapidly. Meanwhile, his other hand was slipping down the elegant curve of Light's spine. All the way down.

"L..." His ex-suspect shuddered violently and arched his hips, his hair shining as he threw his head back. Three fingers pushed into him, much more smoothly than the previous time. "Ah, ah-!"

L's lips twitched to a slight smile as he wriggled his fingers, continuing to pump both his hands as the man below him groaned passionately. A moment later, he removed his fingers and moved up to align their hips, pressing flush.

The brunette's body jerked as the older man's length pressed to his own, the slick skin pressing together in a _perfect_ way and he reflexively hooked his arms around the neck of the man above him. "How can you possibly go again?!"

Really, even if it was nice, he was kind of getting tired of being rendered nonverbal. And- Mm, that felt good...

"Sugar and Light-kun." Pale lips kissed their way down the exposed neck and collarbone, over the numerous circles of raised blood coloring the skin, continuing down the slender chest to suck lazily at a pink nipple.

Light tilted his head back, arching subtly into L's mouth as his breathing grew shallow and he closed his eyes and suddenly bit his lip to stifle a shout as L bucked, the head of his shaft edging in.

The detective's lips twitched to a small smile as he moved deliberately in the other man, pulling halfway out and thrusting hard back in, deeper. He continued moving, one hand straying down to the erection between his parted thighs, circling the tip with his thumb as he lowered his head, working a peaking nipple with his mouth. He no longer had to be so gentle, the brunette wasn't made of glass.

Said brunette responded by wrapping his arms around the older man's back and fisting his hands tightly in the unruly hair, his own spine arching with need as he moved his hips in time, soft moans forcing their way past his lips in time with L's ministrations.

Seriously. Last time.

The detective was almost slamming into him, sucking at the skin on his chest so hard, Light had to wonder if all those popsicles and lollipops didn't do wonders for his tongue. Or, he would have wondered if L's hand wasn't brushing up and down his length in time with his thrusts, and his low husky voice near purring, "L- Nn-Light-kun-!!"

The younger man was shouting again, his voice near dying as his hips bucked in time, his body shaking violently. It was getting more and more difficult to pull his strength together to do _anything_, but he managed to fist his hands tightly in the detective's hair and wrench him back down into a needy kiss.

Yes, _needy,_ so what if he liked kissing L, as if anyone else wouldn't!

Apparently, it surprised L more than anyone as his eyes widened even further. After a stunned silence, he returned the kiss eagerly, securing his arms tightly around Light and pulling him up to sit in his lap.

Light was panting, his eyes wide as the new position combined L's completely _unnatural_ reserve of strength with the suddenly overwhelming force of gravity pressing him flush to the man bucking deeper and harder inside him. A violent shudder ran down his back as L's hand followed the curve of his spine gripped his hip tightly, and his thighs tensed on either sides of the detective's hips. He shouted into the kiss, meeting L's movements and thrusting his hips down roughly, every muscle in his body tensed and shivering.

The detective groaned loudly into the kiss, pushing his tongue into the younger man's mouth insistently and slamming twice more into the tight body above him before Light screamed, his body convulsing as he came, L's release filling him.

The brunette heard the other man whine softly as his movements slowed, continuing the kiss languidly. He had never been this tired in his _life_, he felt his fingers and toes go numb, then his arms and legs. His amber eyes slowly slid shut as he attempted to return the kiss. Before long though, he broke it, his head falling to L's shoulder and his body going limp, half draped over the detective's pale chest.

Wasn't there something that was supposed to happen if he passed out...? Something... L wanted? Oh, who the hell cared anyway, screw it.

The muscles in his body were still quivering slightly even after he fell unconscious.

L looked down at the younger man, lips curved in a slight smile. Carefully, he turned them both over, laying Light down and pulling back, petting his shiny hair like a cat before turning settling on the bed next to him.

Then he bent down, opening the miniature fridge below the nightstand and fishing out a canister of whipped cream.

--

Light shifted slowly, his breathing even and peaceful until it was broken by an indistinct mumble.

Oh, God, what did he _do_ this morning?

.... Oh, right. All that stuff.

.... That _better_ be sweat making him feel sticky right now.

After a moment, he pulled himself together and opened his eyes. "Mn...?"

L leaned down, kissing his ear before pulling back, saying soothingly, "Light-kun is rested now?"

The younger man nodded slightly, closing his eyes and letting his head fall to the side. "Mm..."

Wait a second.

His eyes snapped open as he looked down at himself before his eyes widened and he flushed bright red, shoving up on his hands. "I was kidding!!"

There were stripes of whipped cream crossing randomly across his chest, focusing around his nipples and a large heart drawn over his stomach, the point of it trailing all the way down his pelvis to the tip of his length.

He really hated his life sometimes.

Above him, the detective cocked his head, confused. "But Light-kun promised whipped cream."

"I- Yes, but I was being- It wasn't an _actual_ invite for you to make me pass out and-" He looked back down at himself, the redness creeping down his neck.

The older man followed his gaze, nodding in approval. "Light-kun has made me hungry and turned me on. That sort of combination will increase my eagerness by..." His eyes flicked up as he ran the calculations. ".... Fifty-three percent."

"... And your original eagerness was...?"

L blinked, conveying his disbelief. "Was Light-kun not there to experience it?"

.... Touché.

Light facepalmed (A.N. I dislike author's notes in the middle of a story, but I know I'll forget to mention it if I don't write it now. Yes, I made a word. To facepalm: to smack yourself in the face with the palm of your hand. Spread the word in urban dictionaries across the nation.), muttering quickly, "Just get this stuff off of me."

He wasn't even _trying_ to avoid it anymore. By now, he knew he'd only dig his own grave deeper.

The detective leaned down, lapping at the cream covering a pink nipple, a low sound of approval humming in his throat. He swallowed, licking his lips and looking up at the younger man. "Light-kun is even better with sugar."

The brunette shuddered, not moving his hand from his face and now thankful that it blocked at least some of his expression and blush. His other hand fisted in the covers at his side as he said, "Five times."

L paused, smiling softly and leaning back down, cleaning the rest of the cream carefully, sucking the sugar from the tanned skin. "Light-kun is wonderful every time."

".... If we go just _one more time_, will you promise to let me sleep for as long as I want?"

"Two." The detective finished licking the sweet and moved to the other nipple, sucking at it roughly and swirling his tongue around the sensitive nub, his hand trailing up the brunette's thigh.

"Done- Ahh-!" Light's body jerked as the hand covering his face moved to grip L's tangled hair and he closed his eyes tightly, arching his spine as the older man kissed down his stomach, licking up the cream enthusiastically.

... He really was going soft, wasn't he.

... Figuratively, anyway.

--

An hour and two orgasms later, Light's hands fell from L's back, his nails bloody to match the deep claw marks on the detective's back. He was panting heavily and his skin was covered in a sheen of sweat. His almost closed eyes flicked to the man above him. "Sleep...? _Please_?"

L pushed himself up on all fours, pulling out of the younger man, his elbows trembling slightly, threatening to buckle. He collapsed on top Light, his own breathing just as labored, but his own eyes still open and alert. ".... Yes."

Thank. God.

Light closed his eyes, almost immediately asleep.

--

L let Light sleep through the night and drifted in and out of consciousness himself a few times. Hours later, at what L guessed was a reasonable time, he pushed himself up carefully, looking down at the prone body still dozing below him before leaning down and pecking the boy's cheek. He stood surveying the state of the room with mild amusement as he pulled a fresh set of clothes from the closet.

Blankets tossed to the other side of the room. Sheets half thrown off the bed. Light's normally flawlessly white shirt crumpled on the floor. L's own pants piled with Light's by the bed. An empty whipped cream canister on the bedside table. Another half under the bed. And last, but certainly not least, Light himself splayed out on the bed, the sheets barely covering his body and every inch of skin visible covered with hickeys and bite marks.

This scene gave him a wonderful idea. With an eighty-five percent success rate.

He walked out of the room, shuffling slightly as he made his way to the holding cells and opened the door. "Misa-chan, good morning."

The blonde looked up at him, blinking her bright eyes. "Ryuzaki-kun?"

L nodded, taking a step inside. "Yes, Misa-chan. Are you feeling well today?" She must not have been expecting him, considering the severity of the crime she'd been charged with. But now that Light was practically in the clear, it was obvious this woman couldn't have acted without a much more intelligent and strategic person behind it. And as long as that person wasn't in the building, there was no harm in...

"I... guess." The blonde suddenly bounces slightly, looking up at him hopefully, her eyes full of blind optimism. "Can I see Light-kun!"

L blinked, looking down at her and saying in a staged thoughtful tone, "Well..."

The pop star almost visibly wilted, her pigtails drooping slightly as she stuck out her bottom lip in a pout.

"... I suppose I could allow it, yes."

She immediately brightened, gushing happily. "Oh, thank you, Ryu-chan, I miss him so much!!"

The detective let the nickname slide and continued, "He's sleeping right now though."

"Oh... I don't want to bother him, but... Well, I don't think he'd mind if I just came in for a _little_ while, he must miss me too!"

"I'm sure he wouldn't mind." He began untying the complicated knots attaching the vast amount of bonds on the girl's person.

Misa sighed with near-ecstasy at the prospect before her as she stared off into space, she'd get to see her Light. "Thank you..." She jumped slightly, looking at L again. "Ooh, would you give me ten minutes though? I need to wash up, put on makeup." The pop star giggled softly, tossing her hair. "You know, do the girly thing."

"I suppose." L stepped back and led the young woman from the cell, up several flights of stairs to a large bathroom. "There are many cosmetics in the cupboards, help yourself."

Misa bounced on the balls of her feet, almost squeeing. "Thank you so much, Ryu-chan, you're the _best_!" She kissed him on the cheek and skipped into the room, closing the door behind her.

"...." The detective shook his head, going to the kitchen to make a list of the sweets he wanted and attaching it to the fridge with a magnet in the shape of a chocolate-covered strawberry for Watari to read later. He returned to retrieve Misa twenty minutes later.

It was a _long_ list.

"Are you quite finished, Misa-chan?"

"Almost done, I promise!" A few moments later, Misa emerged, her hair perfectly arranged and shiny and her face made up. "Is Light-kun staying in a cell...?"

The detective shook his head, walking down the hall towards the elevator. "No, his name has been almost completely cleared, so there is no need."

The blonde sighed with relief, following close behind. "Oh, that's wonderful to hear, he must be so happy."

L nodded, internally counting down the seconds until they got to the end of the hall. Eventually, he opened the door, stepping aside and scratching his calf with his toes. "Here you are."

Misa smiled up at him, overjoyed. "Thank you!"

She darted into the room and L closed the door quickly behind her, leaning against the wall and tapping his thumb against his mouth. "Five percent chance Light-kun will need assistance."

A moment louder, a loud scream issued from the room. L's lips twitch to a faint smirk despite himself.

"Light-kun, NOO! NO! NO!"

Light jumped, opening his eyes, trying to force his brain into understanding the situation that lead to his forceful consciousness. "Guh, what the-?"

Misa stood in the doorway, her mouth open and her eyes wide as she looked over the scene. Her beloved was... was... was lying on the bed with his beautiful hair _messed_, and the sheets _strewn_ around him and tangled around his beautiful long legs, with dark red marks up his beautiful neck and beautiful chest and- She shrieked as she noticed the clothes strewn around the room (more specifically that half of them _weren't_ Light's) and the cans of whipped cream around the room.

The brunette's eyes widened as he yanked the sheets up, blushing dark red. "Jesus, Misa, what are you doing here?!"

"I came because I was worried about Light-kun!! I wanted to see my boyfriend, and- and-" She pointed at him, shouting, "I see this! All of this! Why, Light-kun, why!!!"

Light chuckled softly, his voice utterly devoid of humor as he glanced around the room. "Yeah, uh, I'm sure how all this looks..."

... How the hell was he supposed to talk his way out of _this one_?

"WHIPPED CREAM!! SOMEONE ATE LIGHT-KUN!!!"

The young man's blush darkened and he facepalmed, muttering, "Oh, for heaven's sake."

The pop star wailed, clambering on the bed and forcing Light to lean back on the headboard. "Who was it, Light-kun, who was it, I need to know, I deserve-" She glanced to the side and her eyes widened.

Light blinked, following her line of vision, genuinely curious as to what could make Misa _shut up_ under the given circumstances. His own amber eyes widened as he saw the pair of worn obviously _men's_ jeans rumpled on the floor. He quickly shoved a pillow off the bed to cover them. "Right, those are, uh..."

"..." The blonde blinked, sitting down on her legs as a faint blush slowly spreading across her cheeks, her voice still a stunned squeak. "R-... Ryuzaki-san's... those are Ryuzaki-san's...?"

... Well, this was awkward.


	9. Chapter 9

Wah, I'm sorry, guys, I missed my last deadline! I try every five days, and to write a page each day, but for some reason last week a few days I just... didn't. Gonna try to avoid that, but with Fanime this weekend, it may be unavoidable. FAAAAANIMEEEEEEE!!!

Don't own it, but I will. (grin)

Ki11 me, Ki55 me

Light sighed, rubbing his eyes and saying quickly, "Yes."

The blush on the girl's cheeks darkened as she slowly pointed to the mattress below her. "... There was BL in this bed."

Light wrapped the sheets more firmly around his lower body, muttering almost indiscernibly, "There was BL more times than I could damn well _count_ in this bed..."

Misa's face immediately brightened as she squeed, "Misa-Misa loves Light-kun even _more_ now! He is a fan of yaoi too!" She almost tackled him off the bed, squealing happily.

Light fell back to the floor, yelping in pain before yanking an empty canister out from under his spine, blushing dark red as he tossed it under the bed.

The door opened a foot or so and L stuck his head inside. "This was unprecedented."

The blond still hadn't stopped squeeing. "This is so wonderful, when Light-kun and Ryu-chan announce their love for each other, Misa-Misa will take pictures whenever they kiss in public, and she will spearhead their fan club on her television show, and-"

"No! No, no, no, no!" Light's eyes widened as he sat up, saying emphatically, "There will be no love confessions, there will be no _kissing_!"

When the hell had his life turned into a circus and who did he have to kill to make it stop?!

The pop star paused, drawing back, confusion written on her face. "Then.. Light-kun and Ryuzaki-san are not in love...?"

"_No._ It was just an... experiment of L's."

Technically.

Light put a hand on Misa's shoulder, nudging her back slightly. "Misa, it would be really great if you would let me get my pants now." He braced himself as the blonde's sparkling eyes filled with tears again.

"Then... Light-kun... cheated on Misa for nothing... and doesn't like Misa at all!" The idol shoved his shoulder, scrambling up and running from the room, sobbing. "Misa HATES LIGHT-KUN!!"

... Goddamn the whole fucking world and everyone in it but... No, just everyone.

Light glared up at the detective, his voice almost a growl. "... I blame you for this."

"Light-kun never liked Misa-chan. So it shouldn't matter if Misa-chan gets mad at him and decides to break up with him and leave him single."

"Single". Read: _available for a lot of gay sex._

The brunette's eyes narrowed as he pushed himself up, securing the sheets around his waist and walking around the bed to the joined bathroom. "I'm taking a shower."

The detective's eyes flickered up and down the younger man's body as he passed, following close behind him. "I will join Light-kun."

Mmhm. Him, L and a bathtub. Right.

Light turned on his heel, pointing at the older man. "No, you will not join 'Light-kun'!"

L frowned, his already slumped shoulders falling further. "But I could clean Light-kun faster than he could."

"I'm sure you would if you didn't get sidetracked along the way!"

"... But licking Light-kun _would_ make him clean-"

"_Ugh_, no, it wouldn't, that's so _unhygienic_!" Light turned, continuing into the tiled room and looking himself over in the mirror. "Now leave me alone, I'm taking a bath!"

Good God, that was a lot of hickeys.

"Baths are even better for sexy scrubbing."

"For the last time, there will be no sex!"

"... It would make Misa happy again."

Light rolled his eyes, shaking his head and internally counting down the seconds until L would inevitably pin him to the wall and force him to make up for the hours he so selfishly spent _sleeping_. "I'm sure it would." A second later he felt a soft tug at his waist and glanced back to see said detective's hand fisted in the sheet covering his lower body. He felt his face flush as he pulled the white fabric higher, snapping, "Hey! Bad!"

The older man tugged harder. "But the sheet is blocking my view."

"As it's _supposed _to!" He shoved L's hand off and took a step back, eyes narrowed in a scolding glare.

The detective jerked at the thin fabric, matching his steps. "Then it is an unnecessary obstruction."

Dammit, Kira, heart attack all ready, maybe then he'd finally get back to a seven hour a night sleeping schedule!

"It is entirely necessary, now get out of here!" The brunette pointed back to the bedroom, pulling the makeshift robe higher. "I have to clean up!"

The detective wrapped the white clothe firmly in his hand and yanked hard, pulling it from the younger man's grip and letting it fall to the floor. "There. I have to clean too, Light-kun, and it would be senseless to waste water." Despite the "logical" reasoning, his eyes flicked down to the newly exposed skin, pale lips twitching to a slight smile.

The brunette's mouth fell open as he looked at the detective in disbelief. "My God, you have no shame!"

L nodded, pulling his own shirt over his head and dropping it with the sheet. "Light-kun finally noticed." The rest of his clothes followed as he bent to twist the knob for hot water, testing the temperature with a finger. He didn't have to turn to perfectly picture the younger man wrapping his arms around himself and blushing dark red, exhibiting a modesty he really _shouldn't_ have between the way he looked and all he had experienced in the last twenty-four hours. "Light-kun, the combination of your glare and the heat from your blush is making me unnerved." He nibbled his thumb absentmindedly as he perched on the bath mat.

"Well, I wouldn't be blushing or glaring if you gave me a minute to myself!" The brunette reluctantly sat on the edge of the tub, letting his feet swish in the water.

"I haven't had my fill of Light-kun, though." The older man shut the water off, lowering himself in and stretching his back to unwind a few kinks. "Light-kun should sit in my lap. It would be more comfortable than laying against hard porcelain."

Light scoffed softly, slipping into the water and momentarily soaking in the comfortable heat that washed the traces of sweat and saliva and.... whatever else off his person. "I'll pass, thank you."

The detective watched him for a moment before leaning back and closing his eyes, his voice just slightly more relaxed than usual. "Light-kun is always so stubborn."

Dammit, it was not being stubborn, it was displaying common decency that L was obviously devoid of!

The younger man bowed his head, shaking his hair and wetting it thoroughly. "You know, it's not really being stubborn, I'm just tired, even after you _actually_ sticking to your word and letting me sleep, all the muscles are still disoriented. I mean, really, playing tennis once a week and engaging in a nearly day long sex spree are hardly in the same ring of exercising." Light blinked as L failed to respond. He flipped his hair back, pushing his bangs from his eyes and looking to the man beside him. "L?"

The detective's eyes were still closed and his breathing eyen. He opened his eyes blearily, a faint smile on his lips. "I love you, Light-kun."

Light's face went blank.

A second later, L's smile faded and he continued with a tone of importance, "So, give me my cake..."

.... One-.... one day he would have to psychologically analyze how those two thoughts could be placed side by side in L's mind.

"... I-... what?"

He got no response, and even saw the detective's eyelids start to droop further.

"Wait, you can *not* just say you _love_ me, I said there wouldn't be love confessions!"

The detective's breathing remained even and his eyes grew dull.

"You..."

... He was _asleep_?? This was only the second time in his life he had seen the detective asleep and it was inexcusable.

He grabbed the older man's shoulder, shaking him slightly. "You can't be asleep, you have to explain this to me!"

L was slowly sinking in the water, mumbling indistinctly under his breath.

Light watched his slow decent, counting the seconds and twitching his fingers in the water impatiently until the detective's nose hit the water and he woke instantly, sputtering and shaking his head, warm drops jarring from his skin. "Ack- " He coughed, looking up to see Light's expression. "... Light-kun looks like a deer in headlights."

As if he didn't have good reason!?

"What do you expect me to look like, you said you loved me!"

This was so so _so_ very wrong, everything about it was!

Though, he-... dammit, he still couldn't say exactly why!

"..." L blinked. "... Light-kun the percent chance of my saying that is so low that-"

"You said it, L."

The detective shook his head. "Impossible."

"Well, I'm telling you that you did!" Light moved closer, jabbing a finger in L's bony chest. "And then you asked me to give you cake!"

"... Ah. Then perhaps Light-kun _is_ telling the truth. I always dream of cake." The older man paused, looking off into space for a moment. "... Though _this_ time, Light-kun popped _out_ of the cake. I wonder what that means..."

The brunette facepalmed, massaging his temples. "If I sit in your lap, will you not speak to me for the rest of this bath?"

He would deal with this... _thing_ later.

The detective frowned, slightly intrigued by his own accidental confession. "One would think Light-kun would be embarrassed after hearing an admission of love from someone he had sex with, regardless if it were true or not."

... "Regardless if it were true or not", now there was a phrase to think over later.

"It was a dream. It didn't count."

L shrugged, opening his arms. "Light-kun's logic is solid. And I believe I will take him up on his offer."

Light shook his head slightly, secretly grateful that their interaction was back to normal: purely physical. He moved over, straddling the older man's legs and settling on his hips, draping one arm around the man's back and laying his head on the pale shoulder.

He felt the detective wrap one arm around him in return and vibrations hummed through his head as L spoke. "Light-kun wanted to be washed, didn't he?"

... Oh, right. That _was_ the idea.

Light nodded, trying to clear his mind of internal debate for once. "Yes, I suppose."

The older man briefly fished in the water, and when his hands returned into Light's field of vision, they held a bar of soap and a washcloth.

The brunette closed his eyes and felt the slick clothe move over his shoulders and down his arm. He sighed softly, reveling in the grime of the last day being washed away. Between the warmth of the water and the soothing feeling running over his skin, he could almost... fall asleep... "You know, I didn't end up getting that full day of sleep I wanted, you still owe me..." A slight yawn slipped through his lips. "Since _you_ let Misa in."

"I thought Misa would dump Light-kun, and then he would have more time for gay sex."

".... I'm not even surprised at that logic from you."

And he really wasn't. Jesus, with all the time the man spent thinking with the "head" between his legs, it was a wonder he could still use the one on his shoulders for casework.

"Light-kun is learning."

A soft knock interrupted what was sure to be Light's scathing comeback. Instead he tensed, pushing up slightly on one hand, his other fisting loosely in the shower curtain. "Who is it?"

It could just be Matsuda or Aizawa coming to talk to them about the case or something equally mundane...

That would have been a reasonable theory _before_ a high pitched squeal floated in from outside, and a blond five foot tall Satanette with less muscles mass than cleavage somehow managed to burst into the room and take several dozen pictures before Light could yank the shower curtain closed. "Aiiee! Misa-Misa knew Light-kun and Ryuzaki-san would be taking a bath together, she knew! Their love for each other is so pure and wonderful!"

"Misa, get out!" Light couldn't manage to be embarrassed about people seeing him unclothed, now he was just irritated. "I'm burning that damn camera if you don't!"

Hm... Yeah, he was definitely loosing his "perfect composure" mask. Where the Hell was that thing anyway?

The model just tugged the curtain back enough to poke the camera through, bright flashes continuing to light the room. "Misa-Misa-chan is the RyuzakixLight fan club president! She must have pictures for the website!"

"That is absolutely out of the question!" Light's umber eyes narrowed as he tried to cover the lens with his dripping hand. "I will _not_ have a website devoted to this!"

Misa pulled the camera back, her bottom lip sticking out in a pout as she wiped the steaming water off the glass. "But Light-kun will get many admirers, and be even more popular! BL is so _in_ these days!"

The brunette massaged his temples, a faint flush creeping once again to his cheeks. "No, I refuse!" He turned his eyes on L, narrowing them into a glare. "Aren't you going to _do_ anything about this?"

The detective seemed to debate this notion for a moment, staring at the young bubbly woman. "... Misa-chan, will you be making copies of these pictures?"

Misa nodded, smiling happily. "Yes, Ryuzaki-san! And you can have as many as you like!"

"Then I have no qualms, Light."

The brunette's mouth fell open in an outraged scoff as L merely shifted his arms around his body. "Misa, get out, stop that, I don't want people seeing this and _you_!" He turned, shoving against the older man's grip, his normally smooth voice taking on a hiss. "I never agreed to _publicize_ this!"

Misa had either been satisfied with the number of shots she had taken, or been surprised by the bitter tone in Light's voice and she slipped out quickly, pushing the door shut as the younger man stood, pulling a towel around himself quickly.

L watched this movement, blinking. "... Is Light-kun so embarrassed by pornography of himself?"

"Of course I am!! How are you not?" The brunette stepped out of the tub carefully, drying his chest.

"I am always naked under my clothes." The detective settled back, relaxing. "I will admit that Light-kun looks _better_ in such a state though."

... Dammit all, how did he even _pretend_ to use that logic, there's a difference between being naked under clothes and people _seeing_ you-

"That's-" The younger man groaned, facepalming. He was sure he was giving himself a bruise. Hm, if he had a bruise on his forehead, would his father assume it was domestic abuse and kill L? Hm, maybe he should look into this-

"Oh, never mind! I have to get dressed and then _destroy that camera_!"

"Will Light-kun give me the negatives?"

"No, I will not, I am _burning_ those!" The younger man toweled his hair, muttering under his breath, "need new clothes..."

Like _Hell_ was he getting back into the clothes he was wearing when L pounced him.

Finally, L stood, ambling out of the tub and ignoring the drops of water plopping on the floor that would have driven Light insane had he not been more interested in what the older man was _doing_ walking around their rooms completely naked. To his surprised, the detective went straight to the closet and withdrew a clean set of own clothes, identical down to the straight creases in the slacks and button down shirt.

.... Why the hell did he have that in his closet?

"...."

He took the clothes anyway, pulling them on. "Fine, fine." He continued into their shared bedroom, surveying the wreckage with mild exasperation and suppressed amusement.

Damn, if he could allow himself to be a teenage boy for a second, he would be reasonably proud of himself. Half of the stuff around the room was due to him anyway.

.... Especially that dent in the wall, just above the headboard, he distinctly remembered creating that.


	10. Chapter 10

I- (gasp) live- (gasp) ... I know it's been like... a month... and I feel bad (pant) but there was stuff! (groan) And things! (puff) ... I got nothing. (hangs head) There is no one to blame but myself. But I return now! For realz, not for fakes! And I'll really try to get back on schedule, I promise! Oh, and did everyone see frnight's Hacker of the Past? My idea is in there, it was deemed good and people seem to like it! (bouncebouncehappy) Everyone go read!

Oh, and plot. Yeah. I have plot again. Well, the beginnings of plot. But it's there!

Disclaimer: Don't own, but got a hell of a lot of merchandise at Fanime this year.

Ki11 me, Ki55 me

... No, no, wait, he was _not_ a teenage boy, he was perfect. He had to get that back for a while, fix things. Starting with this room.

"We need to clean this place up."

The detective followed close behind him, sitting on the bed, utterly uncaring about his nakedness. "Why should it be appropriate to clean if it's likely Misa-chan has already taken pictures as proof of what happened?"

Light narrowed his eyes, tossing the towel he'd been using to dry his hair over the older man's body. "Because I function better somewhere _neat_."

"Does that mean Light-kun wants to function near the bed again?"

The brunette pursed his still almost painfully bruised lips, throwing an empty canister of whipped cream across the room and into the garbage. "Not until after the room is clean _at the very least_. So get up, I'm changing the sheets."

He was vaguely surprised when L obeyed, standing and taking the towel with him. The older man dried himself before extricating a pair of jeans from a dresser drawer and pulling them on. He then returned, tugging at the sheets tangled together on the mattress. "Then I will assist you."

Light nodded, mildly pleased. "Good, I prefer living somewhere clean." He wrenched the thin fabric from the bed, tossing it in a corner, their clothes from the night before following shortly.

The detective stopped, watching the brunette tidy for a moment. ".... Light-kun said that as if these living arrangements weren't temporary."

R- Right, it was temporary now, wasn't it? When he was a suspect, things like surveillance were never temporary, he should get used to that now.

L ignored him, getting freshly pressed, and probably never used, sheets from a plain cabinet and returning to spread them over the mattress.

"... Well... Yes, I realize I'll be able to go home in two weeks, but still, I'm staying here until then, unless you think it isn't necessary. And _that's_ not exactly likely."

After all, why would he pass up the opportunity to keep him in bed till then?

The detective just cocked his head, saying matter of factly, "Light-kun, the Kira case has been moved here, but there is nothing keeping you. You will be in college anyway, and that will demand your time. And I never said you were being kept here, your percent chance of being Kira does not warrant it."

That.... well....

".... Right." The younger nodded, looking down at the pristine cloth he and L were spreading across the bed. "I guess so."

As if reading the thought Light hadn't allowed himself to form, L continued, "I would be sad if Light-kun left and never came back, but that is hardly a factor for you to consider." He draped a comforter over the made bed, straightening it with his thumbs and forefingers. "Though I suppose Yagami-san would also be lonely without his son."

'Also'? What an interesting word to add.

Light sat on the mattress, laying back on his side and closing his eyes. "I wouldn't just leave, L, you know how important this case is to me."

The detective nodded, fluffing and straightening the pillows. "I find it helps perspective if situations are put in terms of extremities." He perched on the bed before continuing, "But there is still no reason for you to be here constantly. And if there were a change in the case, I would notify you immediately."

.... Huh. When L _wasn't_ treating him like a sex slave, he was actually pretty considerate.

"... Perhaps I'll go home a little later today. For a while..." The brunette yawned softly, letting his eyes fall shut.

"Your mother and sister will be happy to see you."

He felt the bed sink an inch and lips brushed over his temple. When he opened his eyes, L was still leaning over him. "I suppose so..." Light sat up to stretch, forcing L to lean back. "We should get back to work."

Maybe they actually _would_ this time, unless-

L quickly slipped behind the younger, wrapping his arms around his chest and pulling him flush. "I would rather have sex with Light-kun again."

Light groaned, letting his head fall back on the detective's shoulder. "_How_ did I know you would say that?"

"I'm no longer tired, that's why. And the sugar from Light0kun has kicked in now."

...._What-_ Was that supposed to make a kind of sense he didn't have?

".... The sugar from _me_."

L nodded, beginning simply, "Sperm are made almost entirely of mitochondria, Light-kun. Which means they have a lot of energy in them, because they are need it in order to reach the egg of a female in the womb, by going up the cervix, so that means by swallowing them, I received the energy-"

Light slapped a hand over the detective's mouth. "I'm. Aware."

The detective rolled around him, now straddling his hips and attempting to speak through the obstruction over his mouth, "Which means I am now very hyper, Light-kun."

"There are other ways besides sex to get energy out, L!"

"But no other ways are as fun." Pale hands slid once again down his sides, slipping his pants from his hips.

The younger's eyes widened as he pushed against L's still unclothed chest. "Oh, for heaven's sake, you're insatiable!"

"Light-kun has finally noticed." He slid his hand down the brunette's pants, fingers playing over the heating skin as he leaned down to kiss one of the red marks on Light's neck.

"Y-...." He gasped, arching his hips into the dexterous hand and letting his head fall back, hissing as the muscles in his body protested. "God...dammit, L."

He felt a smile curve against his collarbone. "Light-kun is always very stubborn, but he gives in easily enough." L moved his hand faster, thumb flicking over the tip in a way that made the younger man's hips shudder and buck, so he did it again. Once Light's eyes had begun to fall shut and he started to lose the ability to hold back his tiny moans, he slowed his pace, pulling the brunette's pants down.

"Just... changed the goddamn sheets-" Light gasped, his nails digging tightly into the covers as thin fingers moved down, pressing inside of him slowly. "Ahh-" The hands left him briefly and he closed his eyes as he spread his legs, his skin crawling with need again.

He gasped as a husky voice spoke in his ear, "Light-kun should be entered again..." Strong legs pushed under his own, gently but insistently guiding his thighs up.

The younger man's eyes narrowed at the language, but he no longer felt the same heat rising in his cheeks.

Was it good or bad that he was getting used to L's mannerisms? One could argue it shouldn't be a problem if he was adjusting to it, but the human body can be trained to accept almost anything, that didn't mean it _should_ be.

Either way, instead of protesting, he found himself wetting his lips and rocking into the hand manipulating him, going so far as to arch into the digits that briefly left when L slicked them with his mouth.

The detective let his hand slip down, pushing a second digit into the younger man's body and stretching the muscles. The resistance was much easier to deal with now, but the brunette still gave a few new definitions to the phrase "tight-ass", even though he'd only had a little while to resume his obsessive perfectionism. To rectify this, L lowered himself to Light's neck, licking and biting up the column of skin, bone, and muscle almost idly.

The man beneath him took in a shaky breath, exhaling in a quiet moan as he draped his arms around the other's neck, arching his back as the detective's tongue descended to his nipple.

Just... one more round of sex then they would get back to work. Really, finding Kira was... more important than...

L pushed a third finger in as he dragged the flat of his tongue over the pink skin, blowing on it gently.

Light fisted a hand in his hair, the other scratching up and down the older man's spine, his hips shuddering and rocking in time.

Really, it was only sex... only physical contact of a romantic- well, not romantic- a... an intimate nature, so-

"Ah, L-!"

The fingers withdrew and L pressed his own flesh in their place, squirming against the brunette's entrance and easing in through the ring of muscles. "Mmn-"

The younger cried out softly, his legs spreading and his hips jerking, his amber eyes closing tightly against the intrusion and inevitable sting of slight pain.

L moved his hips forward sharply, pressing in to the base, shifting steadily to ease Light in to the feeling again. "Light-kun... should relax." The hand that wasn't supporting him drifted to the brunette's erection, pumping rapidly and teasing the slit with his nail.

-so what did it matter how many times they did it, it was inconsequential except for the fact that it took up so much time that could have been used investigating-

"I can't help it- Ah, God-" His eyes widened as his body almost convulsed against his will under the touch.

The detective's thrusts turned into slams and he drove into the younger man, a talented tongue sucking roughly at the raised flesh in his mouth before teething it lightly, the hand pumping Light's length now slicked with sweat and precome.

- I- Investi... gating... the murders pertaining to his...

Light's eyes snapped open as a shout was pulled from his lips, his nails digging in to the older man's skin and leaving it the same color as the flush rising on his face. His back arched, his chest almost heaving as he panted for breath, a moan elicited with each deep breath. "L, God, L!!"

"Nn-ah--!!" L's eyes shut tightly, his own muscles twitching as he tried to prevent his thrusts from turning erratic though they inevitably would, his body always reacted in this way when he was reaching orgasm, though Light's mind couldn't absorb this right now.

But dammit, he would finish this thought, it seemed especially relevant for some reason; finding Kira was more important than-

A voice hissed in his ear, just low enough that he could almost ignore it through the haze of L moving in him, his lips on his chest and his hand at his length.

"Hm... do I or don't I...? Tough call, but... this is just too good."

Something brushed his face and as he let his head fall to the side he saw a square inch of lined paper.

Then he looked up, his body almost quivering as L brought him closer.

His next moan was cut off in a scream and he felt the man above him jump, stopping all movement. His grip on L's shoulders tightened as his eyes locked with.... with...

Light gasped, his eyes going blank as they stared up at, hands shaking violently, breath coming in short gasps as his vision went white.

... For a completely different reason than he'd have hoped just two minutes ago.

Ryuk.

RYUKCRIMINALMISAWRATHREMSHINIGAMITENNISYOTSUBAJUSTICEAPPLEGODSAKURATRAPEYESPUNISHKILLHIGUCHIPLANPRIDEWORLDDEATHNOTEKIRA

... KIRA....

Light let out a breath, his body relaxing even as his eyes stayed locked with the death god above him.

Kira. He was back.

"Light-kun...?"

L's voice was so distant, miles and miles away, even when it was right above him. The brunette realized he was panting and forced himself to calm. "N-..." He licked his lips.

This was an unforeseen complication. But it could be dealt with.

"I don't know, I-... something felt different. Maybe it was because we've taken a break, it felt more..."

The detective frowned, pushing up slightly. "That scream didn't seem to come from pleasure, Light-kun. Did something go wrong?" He began pulling his hips back gently.

Whoa, no, no, no, just because he had finally gotten his memory back, it didn't mean he had to give up the last round of sex he promised himself.

He held tighter around the older man's neck. "No, I want to finish..."

L fell for the "pleading doe eyes", leaning down to press their lips together softly before continuing on a path down the side of the brunette's neck. "Yes, Light-kun..."

Light pressed into the touch, fisting his hand once again in L's spiky hair. He moaned loudly as L resumed his previous ministrations, gyrating his hips and letting his dexterous fingers play over the younger man's shaft.

The shinigami above them cackled, a grin splitting his face, reveling in Light's inability to acknowledge him at the moment. "Even with me here, you still want him to finish you off? Ballsy, Light."

The brunette twitched, his eyes darting back to the shinigami, narrowed in ill-concealed outrage as he gestured emphatically to the door, mouthing, _Get the fuck out of here!_

That overgrown minion of Beelzebub was going to _pay_ for this.

Ryuk giggled, perching on the foot of the bed. "Been here for a while, Light. S'nothing new."

Oh, _son of a bitch._

The brunette's eyes widened.

L stopped. "—Light-kun?? Your erection just died." He pulled back, looking down at the younger slightly disbelievingly. "Light-kun, what's wrong?"

.... God... dammit.

"...." He sat up and pushed the older man off, his face a dark red. "I can't do this, it's that thing with Misa, it's just- I'm really having a problem with knowing that there's fangirls for us popping up because Misa's uploading pictures and probably _video_, we're really going to have to continue after I destroy her internet connection."

Yes, it was a crappy excuse, but hey, better than "I just realized a death god has been watching us go at it like rabbits for the last few days."

L cocked his head, sitting back. "Does it truly bother Light-kun so much?"

"Of course it does, I mean, it's practically the same as people watching our activities right now."

Behind L, Ryuk chuckled, grinning wider, but the detective couldn't hear it. Instead, he pulled out of the younger man, sitting to the side to allow him up. "Then Misa should have her camera and internet site destroyed."

Light felt himself relax and he stood, dressing. "I'll go talk to her. I should be back soon."

The detective nodded, watching him. "I will get sugary condiments for your return, Light-kun."

The brunette shook his head, muttering, "Sugar obsessed," before walking out quickly. As he left, he glared pointedly at Ryuk. The shinigami took the hint, following close behind like a pet. A big, scary, supernatural death god pet that Light was going to kill as soon as he found out how.

They were going to have a _long_ talk about personal boundaries.


	11. Chapter 11

Alright, so... I'm kind of please. I mean, there's actual plot. And drama. And I do so love my plot and drama. And I'm gonna make this quick cuz it's two thirty in the morning and Wrath is a tired Wrath. Love you all, review.

Don't own. Want. Will get... somehow.

Ki11 me, Ki55 me

"You've been _watching_?!"

Ryuk cackled, shadowing his human. "You mortals are so entertaining. The detective who would put you behind bars even though he loves you, and the mass-murderer who planned his eventual death. It's so interesting!"

What's this "planned" crap?

Light felt his lip curl to a sneer as he snapped, "You're a closet pervert, aren't you! How could you watch all that and call it 'interesting'?! And how could you give me back my memories at _that moment_?!"

The shinigami shrugged. "Entertainment is addicting. And that moment made for some pretty interesting stuff."

The brunette rolled his eyes, walking to Misa's room. While he was out here, he may as well actually get those damn pictures. "That's completely sick."

"But you did want to be reminded anyway. Wouldn't it be better to remember while L has an interest in you, instead of waiting? He could lose interest, or you could. Seemed opportune anyway."

"Not _while we're having sex_!"

Ryuk grinned at Light's glare and flush. "Plus it's fun to watch you squirm with anxiety, Light. Just saying. You're an intriguing human."

Was that supposed to complement him? Or make up for the voyeurism?

His eyes narrowed as he stepped on the elevator to Misa's room. "You sound like _him_ when you say it like that, you realize."

The shinigami attached himself to the ceiling, looking down at the young man. "Bet that would make for a better "climax", wouldn't it?" He laughed, twisting. "You wanna think of _that_ every time you have sex with him now?"

Light's teeth gritted as he hissed, "Oh, shut up, I _never_ want to hear you talk about L and me, got it?"

"Told you before, Light, I'm not on your side."

"I don't care if you're not on my side, stop being a lecherous pervert, really, at least _try_ to live up to being a death god!"

... It made perfect sense, just- Oh, never mind!

"Few other things to do in the shinigami world, Light."

Ewww. Ew.

The brunette's eyes widened as the elevator door opened. "Are you serious? _Thi_s is what you do in your spare time??"

"Nothing funnier than the faces humans make mid-intercourse."

The human's eyes narrowed, his lips pursing. "Sex is a joke in the shinigami world." He walked down the hall.

"Almost as funny as genocide, yeah."

Light ignored him, knocking on Misa's door. "Misa?" He blinked as a loud THUD floated from inside, followed by rapid footsteps before the door was yanked open.

"Light-kun!" The blonde stood in the doorway in nothing but a backless black Lolita apron and white bloomers. "Misa-Misa _knew_ Light-kun would forget being gay and come back, and Misa-Misa is prepared too!"

Light jumped back, covering his eyes quickly. "No! First of all, I'm not gay, second of all, put some damn clothes on, Misa!"

Yep, he was gay. Definitely gay.

Misa's smile fell, blue eyes clouding with disappointment. "But then..." Her cotton candy pink lips scrunched to a pout as she crossed her arms. "Why else would Light-kun see Misa-Misa?" Before the brunette could answer, she perked, smiling again. "Ooh, maybe it's to get copies of the BL pictures of him and L?"

Light's eyes narrowed. "_No_. In fact, what I came here to talk to you about was taking those down."

"What?! But _whyyy_!" The model's eyes filled with tears as her shoulders fell in defeat. "Light-kun and Ryuzaki-san already have fifty subscribers on the Internet, and the site has only been up for a half hour!"

Fifty people were watching him have sex?!

"_What_?! My God, what is wrong with the world!" He walked past the young woman quickly, going directly to the laptop set up on the coffee table.

All fifty of these people were going to meet very sudden and unfortunate ends.

Misa followed at his heels like an overly cute lace-covered puppy. "Don't worry, Light-kun! They can't download the pictures, they must order them! The ones posted on the website are just samples!"

The brunette's lips pursed as he searched the picture history.

....

His eyes widened.

...

He covered his mouth with his hand to hide his blush.

....

Oh my _God_, where did she _get_ these, surveillance cameras??

"I suppose they could save the samples, but that would be cheating! Don't you think so, Light-kun?"

"Dear.... God." He shook his head, taking the pictures down as quickly as he could.

Misa's eyes widened as she grabbed Light's shoulders. "Ah! Light-kun, what are you doing!"

His patience with the world was _really_ wearing thin.

"I am taking this site down, I told you I was. You shouldn't have put it up in the first place, it's a violation of my privacy."

The blonde's eyes widened as she pulled at Light's arm, near panicking. "Don't take Misa-Misa's internet!"

A voice like gravel floated from behind both of them, chuckling. "Could just tell her those pictures are stopping you from enjoying 'one on one time' with your detective sex-outlet, Light. That would shut her up."

He paused.

God, did it suck when telling the truth was his best option.

"... Ugh." Light's shoulders fell as he sighed, turning to glare at Ryuk before looking to the young model. "Misa, I don't think you understand how much these pictures are bothering me."

Misa perked, blinking with confusion. "Bothering... Light-kun?" She bowed her head, saying dejectedly, "If they bother Light-kun that much, then... Misa-Misa will stop the subscribers..."

"They really do. Misa, I can't even forget about them when I'm..." The brunette pursed his lips, continuing reluctantly, "With L."

Did he have to draw her a damn diagram?

The blonde blinked, staying quiet for a moment before she said, "But... wouldn't that help Light-kun, thinking of pictures?"

He twitched, lips pursing slightly. "... No, because I'm thinking about people _looking at_ the pictures."

Misa stared at him blankly for a moment before her eyes bugged. "Oh- OH!"

_Yeah. Oh._

"Light-kun, Misa-Misa is so sorry! Sorry, sorry, sorry!" The young woman pulled her laptop towards her, pulling up the half-dismantled website and continuing to delete the pictures. "Don't worry, Misa-Misa will send viruses to all the subscribers and mess up their computers so that the pictures don't spread, okay?"

Finally the woman was thinking with her head.

Light sighed, relaxing. "_Thank you._" He stood, bending down to brush his lips over the blonde's forehead before he straightened. "I'll see you later, Misa." With that he left.

The model blinked at the screen, staring blankly for a moment before she turned to look after him, her face dark red. She whimpered softly, cocking her head slightly like a puppy longing to follow her master after being told to stay. A second later, she went back to her computer, working even faster than before.

--

Ryuk cackled behind him, nearly falling from the air. "You have a habit of giving people fast hope, you know that! Either that or you're just naturally a bastard."

"It's a natural talent, I assure you." Light stepped back on the elevator. "Now go away."

He was going to have enough trouble trying to maintain that "poor overwhelmed virgin" facade, he didn't need to try to do it while an eldritch death god hung over him commenting on their activities like a perverted cheerleader.

...

Uggghhh, _bad_ mental image, why was he burdened with having a superior mind with the ability to picture anything!?

Ryuk followed close behind him, a spring in his wings. "No way, Light, I'm seeing how a love tryst between a mass murderer and his passionate detective works out. S'better than soaps."

The young man glared, quieting his voice to a whisper as he passed by a point he knew contained security cameras. "There will be no 'love tryst' with you standing over us, there will be no 'love tryst' at all."

No 'love tryst', hell, no _love_ period.

The gravelly voice quieted to mimic his own, floating from mere inches away. "And what are you gonna do about the fact that if L finds out you're Kira, he'll put you away without a second thought? Heh, though you're not exactly innocent, what with planning his death and all."

Light's eyes sharpened, glaring ahead as he hissed, "That's not a problem, is it, as he won't be finding out." He was nearly cut off in a gasp as Ryuk sped in front of him, putting them face to face with only inches between them.

"Only reason he hasn't found out so far is because you were so guarded about it. What're you gonna do now that you can't be guarded around him without seeming to lose interest?" A wide grin curled Ryuk's lips. "Either way, Light, it's bombed. Which is why I'm sticking around to see what you do."

He was so right...

The brunette's wide eyes seemed to be glued to the shinigami, no matter how much he wanted to back away. Eventually he managed to take a step back, his voice low and calm. "I'll think of something. Stay out of it." With that, he continued past the death god towards his joined room with L.

Ryuk turned to watch him go, his toothy smile splitting his face. "Don't worry, Light, I'm gone for now."

The young man paused, unable to stop the soft sigh that passed through his lips.

.... Dammit....

After a second, he opened the door and stepped inside, sliding it shut behind him. "Managed to get her to take it down, thank- " Light blinked as he looked up to see the detective half curled on his side in bed, sleeping peacefully. "...."

He felt himself smiling and he didn't know why.

The brunette shook his head, walking to the bed and laying down beside the warm, thin, deceptively _human_ body he now remembered as his perfect enemy. After a moment, he buried his face in the pillow, his whisper inaudible through the barrier it provided.

"... what am I supposed to do..."

An arm draped over him and he jumped, but as he looked up, he saw L was still asleep, even as he shifted closer to him, pressing flush.

If he suddenly pulled away from L emotionally, it would be obvious something had happened, and if L thought he had changed, he might start rethinking Light's Kira-percentage. If he tried to remain open and relaxed around L, he would see something had changed in Light's fundamental personality. After all, since his memories returned, he had been less...

The detective sighed softly, breath brushing over Light's neck, his forehead resting on the younger man's slender shoulder.

...

The brunette leaned into the touch, closing his eyes again.

The older man stirred at the contact, opening his eyes, looking Light up and down. After a moment, he raised his hand, running his fingers through the silky russet hair, his voice soft. "Did you make Misa-chan take down the pictures?"

Light nodded, opening his eyes and fighting down a yawn.

He was suddenly so tired...

"I convinced her." His eyes narrowed as his cheeks flushing faint pink. "I had to tell her _why_ though."

"You told her that you lost your erection?"

"... Not in so many words."

"Does she have pictures left over?"

".... Probably, yes. Why exactly would you need with pictures of me and you, it's not like you lack for visuals."

"I would like some. For when Light-kun is at home."

He facepalmed, rolling his eyes.

... _Really_? Was he _really_ surprised?

"... So she _does_ have more?"

The brunette pursed his lips, settling into the mattress, grumbling, "I have no idea, probably."

The detective leaned forward, pressing his lips against Light's forehead before he pushed himself up, standing. "Then I will be back."

"Ugh." Light shook his head, pushing up and sighing as L left. He followed suit, standing and stretching as he watched the door and listened to L's footsteps pad softly down the hall.

"Thought you'd take advantage of my absence and screw him again." Ryuk cackled as he stuck to the ceiling above the bed like a spider.

Light twitched, his entire body tensing. "What exactly are you doing?" His Death Note dropped at his feet and for a moment, there was the unmistakable urge to take a step back.

"Forgot to leave this with you."

The brunette knelt, picking the notebook up.

_His_ notebook.

He straightened, looking the book up and down as if he expected to find a drastic change in its appearance. "I can't keep this in here, he'll find it. I don't suppose I can ask you to hold it, can I?"

The shinigami shook his head, letting himself drift to the ground on black wings. "You know the rules, Light, you own that note. Why don't you just hide it or something?"

Light's lips twitched to a grimace, but he nodded. "Right, right. Where am I supposed to..." The brunette cast his eyes around the room, muttering to himself, "I don't have long before he gets back, I just need to find somewhere temporary, what won't he need in the next twenty-four hours..." The brunette sighed, walking to the closet, opening it and kneeling. He lay the book down neatly on the floor, tearing a page out before sliding the thin book behind a rack of shoes.

God knew L didn't plan to leave the _bedroom_ for the next twenty-four hours, let alone go anywhere that would involve shoes. It wasn't a perfect plan, but what was he supposed to do with minutes left to hide his greatest weapon.

"That'll do for now." The young man stood, picking up the spare sheet of blank paper with him.

Ryuk cocked his head. "What are you gonna do with the torn page?"

Light looked down at it, flipping it over in his fingers before folding it neatly and sliding it into the inner pocket of his jacket, managing to push it through a hole in the lining inside. "Just in case."

The death god grinned widely. "Once a murderer, always a murderer, eh, Light?"

He narrowed his eyes, turning to look Ryuk in the eye for the first time since he phased in. "I'm not abandoning his destiny."

And he wasn't.

"Sure, Light. Whatever you say." The door opened.

... He wasn't.


	12. Chapter 12

IMPORTANT: Okay, guys, uh... I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY!! I don't know what happened, I just- just- writing got hard and I kept getting distracted and I'M SOOOOORRRRYYYY!! So this time, I need you guys to really kick my ass with reviews, okay, if it takes me longer than a week, message me, bug the hell out of me and I'll get right on it, really! And, erm... I'm sure there were a couple of things to go with this chapter, but... I don't remember them. Bummer.

Disclaimer: It would be terrible if I owned these characters, they would do nothing at all for weeks at a time! And then they would get bored and they'd have to turn to each other for comfort and entertain- oooh.... Maybe I *should* own these characters.

Ki11 me, Ki55 me

Light turned to see L shuffle back in, pausing to push the door closed with his foot. "Light-kun, Misa-chan is getting more pictures developed for us, she threw the other ones away."

The younger man straightened his jacket on the hanger before closing the closet, walking to meet the detective. "I don't want to see those pictures _anywhere_ but here, if they get on the Internet again, heads will roll."

L held up a coiled wire. "I took her cable."

Ah, that _did_ make him feel better.

".... Alright then, fine, I'll tolerate that." The brunette walked back to the bedroom, trying to force the tension from his shoulders and push all plans from his head.

He felt as if L would know the second his mind strayed back to the Death Note and to the detective's eventual downfall.

And when a strong hand snagged the collar of his shirt, he almost thought the idea had flitted from his mind and projected into the older man's.

"Light."

The brunette's breathing hitched and he turned, his expression rearranged to a mildly curious mask and his eyes bright with innocence. "Yes?"

Please, please, please, please, he had gone through _way _too much to be caught because his stupid innocent-self had allowed his pursuer to get so close he would know-

"Light-kun should continue hugging me." L beckoned him.

.... U-... Uh....

Hell, maybe he was just so paranoid, L didn't even have to _do_ anything, his mind just assumed he was three steps ahead of him.

"...We.... weren't hugging." He reluctantly stepped forward, and L gestured him closer. "We've _never_ hugged."

The older man cocked his head. "But we have. Light-kun often hugs me in order to pull more of me in during sex, even if it doesn't work."

H-He did _what_ now??

Light blinked, his face flushing. "..." He took another step forward, letting L drape his arms around his waist before he hooked his hands on the detective's shoulders, burying his apprehension below his charm. "Yes, I suppose... " His arms wrapped around the older man's back, pressing their chests together. "But that's more... sex." He had to try very hard to keep himself from reacting to L tightening his grip, pressing them flush.

He hated this... L felt so warm, and he was so comfortable against him, but any second, he expected to hear the click of handcuffs...

"Cuddling counts too." The detective moved back slowly, sitting on the bed and bringing Light with him.

The brunette's breathing hitched softly as his hands fisted in L's shirt. "It's not like we do that _often_."

...

"Do we?"

"Every time after sex." The older man buried his face in Light's neck, nuzzling slightly.

".... Touché." He didn't want to bare his neck, but he did, lowering his shoulder to allow the other more access to the already marked skin. "Don't we have work we should be doing?"

"The task force is recording everything in our absence." Hands ran down Light's back.

Oh come on, no, no, no, no, move your damn hands back up, he couldn't try to be needy and passionate right now.

"We should still be doing something, this is your _job_, and my sole purpose here is to help you."

_Not_ to be your personal concubine.

The detective shook his head, hunching further to run his lips down the skin bordered by Light's shirt, pausing as he got to the first button and nipping the spot above it before moving down and undoing the top catch with his teeth. "I am L. I'm not questioned very often."

The brunette's body pressed into the touch and he was immediately furious with himself.

Then again... if he didn't respond, L would realize something was off.... and besides that-

The older man let himself fall back, pulling Light with him as he wrapped his arms tighter around the younger man's waist. "I admit I didn't have entirely pure motives when I wanted to hug you, Light-kun."

Ryuk cackled from the next room.

... Besides that... L could have one last round before he made the curtain call.

So he let his head fall to the side to further bare his neck as L ran his lips over the warm skin and blocked out Ryuk's laughing long enough to say, "I didn't think you did. But, really, L, we've been at this for _days_."

"Light-kun exaggerates."

The brunette raised his brow.

"... Doesn't he?"

"_Days._"

"... Light-kun must forgive me, but I'm afraid I haven't been paying much attention to the passage of time."

The younger man rolled his eyes, pushing up on his elbow. "Yes, fine, but now that I've pointed it out to you, you have to realize that my body is still tired! I was-" He felt a flush rise on his cheeks and his umber eyes narrowed. "You know I was a virgin, I'm not used to this."

.... And so what if he was, it was _personal choice_, he could have had anyone he wanted, it just so happened that he hadn't found anyone worthy of being his first. That said, heaven knows why he allowed _L_ to take the prize.

"But if we have more sex, your body will get accustomed to it."

"Oh, for God's sake, L, how long can you go?!"

.... Oh, why did he say that, why, why, why, why, _why_ did he say that?

L stared at him blankly for a moment. "That is an unanswerable question, Light-kun, considering I have never gone as long as I can."

"... Don't you feel tired _at all_?" Light lay back, his hand fiddling with the cuff of his shirt.

The detective gave a quick nod, saying simply, "I feel something. But not much has changed since the first intercourse session between us."

Seriously, this man was a damn cyborg, that was the only explanation for him still being able to _move_ after all that exertion.

"... Half of me wants to find out how much stamina you have, but I'm not that masochistic."

The elder perked, and before the brunette could blink, L's weight was on top of him again. "Light-kun just made a wonderful suggestion."

"_Half_, L, _half_-!"

"Please, Light-kun?"

The younger man's eyes narrowed and he opened his mouth before pausing. "But..."

... Well... he _did_ say L could have one more time.

L watched the brunette beneath him shift as he thought, licking his lower lip before chewing it absentmindedly. But he eventually relaxed, letting a reluctant sigh pass his lips before he continued, "... Fine, fine, I suppose..."

"Light-kun is the best person in the world." The detective's hands gripped his hips; the skin beneath his pants already covered with faint bruises and scratches from the previous days "activities". Before the brunette could react, he found himself on his stomach with dexterous fingers unclasping his pants.

Ryuk's grating laughter floated from the kitchen and for a moment, Light's hands fisted tightly in the covers beneath him, pure rage curling in his stomach at the shinigami's... at... dammit all, he was a _God_, not some means of entertainment for a lowly grim reaper!! L's hands moving smoothly across his skin brought him out of his fuming in time for him to react. He shoved the death god from his mind, pushing himself up slowly on his hands and knees, denying the small flicker of anticipation that shot through his veins as the detective slid his pants down.

Behind him, the older man let his fingers trail up the back of Light's thighs, soft touches, almost caresses. Until his hands moved up to part the brunette's cheeks and a second later, Light took a quick breath through his nose as he felt a slick muscle push into him and flick against the inner walls of his entrance.

His hands, that had just begun loosening their grip, once again snapped in the covers and his eyes widened...

W.... Was... L allowed to do that? Was _anyone_ allowed to do that to any other person ever?

His mind was cut off from its musings as he felt more slide into him and L began pushing and pulling gently with his tongue, slicking the skin and sending little electric shivers of pleasure up Light's spine. The shivers turned into sparks and the brunette's body jerked violently as a hand suddenly brushed his length before the digits wrapped around the base tightly and stroked the tightening skin.

Light's eyes were wide and he heard a breathy moan escape his lips before he could bite it back. He swallowed hard as he felt L pull back before dragging the tip of his tongue up the brunette's spine, exciting a violent shiver. A second later, there was a split second of familiar pressure on his slicked entrance and the detective slid inside of him.

It was... It still felt... good, but now that he knew... it felt like he shouldn't let L just-

Light cried out softly and bowed his head as the older man moved, pressing in to the base before starting a fast rhythm.

-just... do this to him, should his hips really be bucking like that, moving in time with his... his...

L continued the pace, and _waves_ of pleasure coursed up and down his body, making him close his eyes tightly and another moan slipped past his lips as he felt cool hands sliding down his thighs, one straying back to his shaft and grip it almost too tightly, pumping in perfect time with his movements.

Oh _God_, oh... what was... L? He was his nemesis, wasn't he...?

Then the detective moved faster, almost slamming into him and each thrust invading his body in the most perfect-

- terrible, disturbing, _evil­_-

- way, and it felt so damn good he almost wanted to get away from it, but he couldn't. The hand on his length was lubricated with his own precome and sweat and the fluidity of the strokes was...

Ohh _God,_ why did sex have to feel good, why did it have to lower inhibitions, why did _L_ have to be so good at it?

The older man's lips descended on his neck, kissing, sucking Light shouted, moving his hips back in time to get more of that feeling because maybe if he just _finished_, L would leave him alone.

"A- Ah, L..!"

... And because he needed to feel it just a _little bit_ deeper...

He heard a tiny gasp right by his ear and everything got faster, L was moving harder, deeper, thumbing the tip of his shaft, nails playing with the head lightly and Light was _shaking_, it was so good...

He threw his head back suddenly and he felt his body spasm, muscles tightening and the waves of pleasure suddenly stopped for a split second before they flooded him, his vision swimming.

_L, L, L, L, L, L, __**L-**_

"Oh, God, L!!" He felt something inside him snap and he almost screamed as he came. His body continued bucking and shuddering during L's last few thrusts before Light felt liquid fill him and the older man immediately slowed, eventually moving back to pull out.

They were both panting, covered with sweat and exhausted.

Well, as far as Light was concerned.

But that didn't explain why L was taking his hips and rolling him over. Or why he was ducking down-

Oh, you've gotta be kidding me.

"L, w-" Light closed his eyes tightly, his hands jumping to the headboard and gripping it tightly, body shuddering violently as L's tongue played around his shaft. "Ah, Mn-...!"

The detective sucked at the slit, bobbing his head slowly, thin fingers moving slowly down, the tips brushing over the younger man's entrance once again.

The brunette bit his lip hard, his muscles still almost tingling from his last orgasm, and it was all he could do to bite back a noise that anyone else would have called a whine when L sped up, his tongue swirling around the rosy head.

Two fingers poked into him, immediately moving in and out of him rapidly, spreading and curling and making his insides feel on fire.

Light threw his head back, spine arching as he squirmed his hips urgently, wanting more than anything for L to stop, just for a second, not because it didn't feel good, but because he felt like he was about to lose his mind. He relinquished his grip on the headboard to bring one hand down to his mouth, biting the skin of his wrist hard to stifle a shout. "Mnn-Mm!!"

L glanced up at the muffled noise and reached up, pulling the wrist down to pin it on Light's stomach, continuing to bob his head, letting his teeth just barely graze the skin.

Light opened his eyes with difficulty, looking down. "Wh- Why the hell did you- AH!!" His body spasmed violently as the fingers inside him twisted, jutting roughly into him.

Ohhh, this was like torture, Hell, this _was_ torture, it was just disguising itself by feeling good, so goddamn good-!!

His nails dug into the soft skin of his stomach and he felt the muscles there contract as he released. "L!!"

The detective swallowed it all, sucking him clean as he shuddered and gasped for breath before he slipped his fingers out, flicking against the rim on the way and causing the body beneath him to jolt. He moved up on the younger man's body, moving his knees beneath Light's thighs and pulling hip up into his lap. "Light-kun is too good..." He bucked his hips, pressing into him again.

The brunette shivered, panting hard and draping his arms around the older man's neck, his hips jerking forward at the movement. "L..."

For the love of Kira, how many times could this guy go... Maybe he actually *knew* he was Kira and was planning to do this till Light had a heart attack just to get back at him....

.... Now he felt worried. That somehow seemed very very plausible at the moment.

Then again, he just had two orgasms in a row, who the hell was he to decide anything?

He felt L's hands glide across his sweat soaked skin to grip his hips, pushing him down in time against his thrusts before they continued, gripping Light's cheeks and fingering his rim.

God... this _had_ to be over soon...

He was moaning loudly in time, his tan chest pressed to the detectives pale one when he looked up.

L's face shone with sweat, and his breathing was shallow, at least he was _capable_ of being tired then. The older man met his eyes and kissed him hard, sucking at his bottom lip as Light fisted his hands in L's hair.

L continued moving, bucking into the younger man, but he let one of his fingers push in alongside his shaft, alternative thrusting with one then the other.

Light's eyes widened and his body jerked violently, their kiss muffling his cry as he tensed, his hips jerking wildly as the detective wriggled his fingers expertly.

L pressed another finger in, scissoring them with each thrust while his other hand moved to Light's front, stroking him roughly in time.

The brunette had to break the kiss, burying his face in the crook of L's neck as his body bucked, his nails digging into the older man's skin as he tried to muffle his shouts.

This had to be over soon, _please_ let it be over soon, he was going to go insane, his skin was crawling, he could hear his blood rushing through his ears, and it still hadn't stopped feeling good...

"L, God, g- sto-" He shuddered at a particularly hard slam and bit his lip, his vision starting to go white and he only dimly recognized the feeling of lips skimming down his neck, biting and sucking at his collarbone. A third finger was pumping inside of him, still alternative with L's shaft and both hands twisted, one inside him, the other around his straining erection.

"AHHH-!!" He bucked and came, arching hard as he screamed his sweet release.

And he thought he was tired before... that was nothing, _this_ was... Ugh, every part of him that wasn't aching was numb with the sensory overload. His hands slid slowly down L's back, as he tried to catch his breath

"Light-kun..." L kissed up his neck gently, his tone soft. "Are you at your limit? You're spilling..."

The brunette twitched slightly as the fingers slid out of him and L raised his arm to show his hand covered in his own release.

He wet his lips and swallowed before he heard his own voice say, "I... I said that we would go until you couldn't..."

What the hell was wrong with him?


	13. Chapter 13

Oh, God, why do I suck so bad at this "Update every week" thing?! By the way, a special thanks to Black-Dranzer-1119 and 6u355 wh0 for reviewing and getting my ass in gear. By the way, everyone pat 6u355 wh0 on the back, whoever they are, they got me to actually sit down and write this bastard cuz I wanted more reviews like that, as unorthodox as they were (bonus points for 1337 5k1||z). We're out of the sexxing for now (I know, heart breaking) and finally into the plot! And drama! And I do so love my plot and drama!! Anyway, tell me what you think, guys, and if you think it's been too long since I updated KICK MY ASS OVER IT. Seriously, bug the hell out of me, I'm begging you. God, this is a freaking long Author's Note, sorry, all, I'll let you get back to your smut.

Disclaimer: Don't own, if I did, people would be beating down my door because the series would only be on volume eight and I wouldn't have updated for three years. (sweatdrop)

Ki11 me, Ki55 me

He saw L's lips twitch to a faint smile before he was guided back slowly, the detective's length still inside him. "This then, Light-kun." A hand gripped his ankle firmly and pulled him to lie on his side, one leg over L's shoulder and the other between the older man's thighs. "I want to see if it's better or not."

Light was already shuddering at the feeling of the detective's length twisting inside him, but L wasted no time to get him shouting again, almost immediately pulling halfway out and thrusting back in, making his muscles jerk wildly and his hand fist roughly in the covers to anchor him. "A- Ah, L!"

A pale hand wrapped around his length again, pumping loosely as L pulled out entirely, giving Light a split second to clear his head and regain his wits before he slammed back in, gyrating his hips roughly, eliciting a loud moan. The detective leaned down, nipping the brunette's shoulder, his voice low. "Light-kun isn't so tight anymore..." He pushed deeper.

Light felt heat rise to his face as he panted, his body jerking. "Wh- Who's fucking fault is that- Ghh, L-!"

The older man's lips twitched to a small smile as he nuzzled the other man's neck softly. "It means Light-kun is more comfortable now." He resumed his actions, one hand playing over the brunette's length, his hips jerking forward in steady, rapid thrusts.

"Mm-Nn-" Light bite his lip, his mind somehow wiped clean of the scathing comment he knew was there seconds before as L gripped him tighter, pumping faster. He moved a shaking hand up his body, pushing the sweaty russet bangs from his eyes before fisting in the pillow above his head.

The detective's hips only moved faster, his free hand sliding down the brunette's body, slicked with the sweat that covered the younger man's body. Light closed his eyes tightly as he felt a thin digit push inside him alongside L's length, pushing and pulling in time. A spasm tore through his body as the finger pressed against a certain spot inside of him. "L, God!"

He heard a soft gasp and a murmured, "Light-kun..." and the digit inside him curled, rubbing repeatedly, and making him almost convulse, his hips moving of their own accord. He barely felt the lips brushing against his own, biting softly at his red lower lip, but he felt L move faster, he felt himself being almost shoved into the plush mattress and his mind leaving him once again as L's speed increased. His scream was swallowed in the detective's kiss as he tensed, his hands shaking violently as he came, the detective doing the same just a few seconds later.

... How many times was this... seriously... he lost count, like... three hours ago. He was so tired, so goddamn tired and his body was buzzing.

He almost whimpered with thanks as L _finally_ rolled off of him and wrapped his arms loosely around his tan shoulders, his voice a low rumble in his ear.

".... Light-kun, I have reached my limit."

Thank. God. All of them and himself included.

The brunette was almost gasping for breath and he easily allowed L to pull him to his chest. He closed his eyes, feeling the redness slowly fade from his face. "Finally..."

A tiny smiled curved L's lips as his own breathing evened. "... Light-kun looks very attractive when he spills. It makes me want to fill him more."

Fucking nymphomaniac. He was never having sex again after this.

The younger half opened his eyes, forcing a glare. "Damn pervert."

"Light-kun warrants it." The detective leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to Light's forehead.

He was going to kill L the next time he had a chance, really.

".... Hm." He closed his eyes, pulling the sheets over himself.

... But... he really was, wasn't he?

L hugged him to his chest. "Light-kun seems so perfect."

His eyes snapped open. "..."

He did, didn't he?

He settled back on L's chest, his cheek against the pale collarbone. "And you _seem_ like an uncaring pompous, one-track genius when it's only have true."

... People aren't always as they seem, L. God, you of all people should have figured that out by now.

"Light-kun isn't very good at taking compliments, is he?"

"I suppose not." A small yawn passed his lips and he pushed up slowly, wincing very slightly as soreness suddenly throbbed through his muscles. "I'm going to shower."

".... Does Light-kun need help?"

Light rolled his eyes, shaking his head as he stood, collecting a pair of clean clothes and walking to the bathroom. "I won't be long, I'm sure you can amuse yourself for that time."

The detective watched him go, shrugging very slightly. "If Light-kun says it."

The door shut and the lock clicked in place.

L turned away, stretching his arms across the bed as a small yawn passed through his lips.

He stopped. His fingers had brushed something that was not a smooth sheet or plush pillow, it felt like...

He turned, picking up a small square of pure white lined paper and flipping it over and over in his fingers.

"... Strange...."

At that moment, a dark and looming shadow passed through his peripheral vision, something tall, spidery and terrifying. His head snapped to the side, his eyes wide as he watched it float through the door into the bathroom. L was completely silent as he waited.

Light did not scream. He didn't shout for help, all he could hear was the tiniest intake of breath, followed by a grating cackle.

"Don't look so embarrassed, Light, I've seen you naked plenty of times, most of them in the last two days."

The water was turned on higher and L heard the muffled sounds of the shower curtain being dragged aside and back.

L's wide eyes narrowed slightly and a frown marred his face. He pushed up quietly, pulling his pants on. "Light-kun, I'm going to get more sugar."

"Alright," Light called, his voice betraying no hidden emotion.

"Oh, good, now you can figure out where you'll hide the notebook, can't you? Hm, no rest for the wicked, you don't even get a nap after all that 'work'."

The detective walked to the door, making a show of closing it, just loud enough for Light to hear him. He leaned against the door, pressing his ear to the wood.

A moment later, Light's normally calm voice snapped, "Did you have to _watch_, Ryuk!? I mean, really, I couldn't have just a few hours of privacy!?"

L blinked, pressing closer to the door.

The thing he called Ryuk laughed again. "Didn't seem to have much of a problem coming that time, though."

"That- Shut up, will you, you still could have left!"

"Heh, smooth move, Light, blaming your 'failure' on those pictures. Though Misa being a yaoi fangirl, did _not_ see that one coming."

Light's voice shuddered with disgust. "Ugh.... don't remind me of her or those pictures."

"Takes skill to come when my face is leering right at you, though, gotta give you that." The voice snickered. "I wanted to see if I could make you fail again, but I guess not."

The shower turned off and L heard the muted sound of shifting clothe with Light's next words.

"Shut up, I have to think!"

"'Bout what? The whole Kira thing?"

"No, about the Death Note, do you have _any_ idea how impossible it will be to hide something like this in a room with a detective of L's caliber, whether he suspects me or not!"

"You managed it before."

The bathroom door opened and Light walked out, fully dressed and toweling his shiny russet hair. "That was in my bedroom. I had it memorized, I knew everything about that space, this is an entirely new playing field."

".... L's bedroom is a playing field?"

"Everywhere is a playing field right now." He walked to the closet, opening it and kneeling to retrieve the thin black notebook. He stood, examining it and sighing softly. "... what to do..."

The phantom flew above him, looking down. "Hey, hey, Light, think L would let you off the hook if you told him you're Kira?" He grinned and twisted his body, watching the young man standing below him.

"Hm, funny joke, Ryuk. Now shut up." He cast his eyes around the room, thinking for a moment. He licked his lips, saying hesitantly, "Yes, that'll.... work. It's thoroughly inelegant, but it'll work." He walked to a desk in the corner of the room and dragged it forward, kneeling to grip the carpet in the very corner and ripping it back. He put the Death Note down carefully and replaced the carpeting. "Good think it's thin, I don't think anyone will be able to..." Light stood and pushed the desk back into place, examining his work before nodding.

Ryuk dropped down beside him, watching the brunette's face. "Having second thoughts, Light? You could just give up your memories, you know. No one would ever find out, you'd be scot-free to live happily with your boy toy."

Bronze eyes narrowed on the shinigami's face. "I'm not speaking to you anymore." The young man walked back to the bed, sitting down and continuing to towel his hair.

"Just listing your options for you, Light." Ryuk grinned. "And I could touch you with the Death Note whenever just to see your reaction again and again. That'd be fun."

Light twitched, his eyes narrowing to a glare.

".... Fine, it was just a joke, jeez." Light nodded emphatically to the door and Ryuk sighed. "Alright, alright, I get it, I'm going to look for apples."

With this, the shinigami flew through the wall and left Light to collect himself.

Outside, L straightened, pausing a moment before opening the door and walking inside. "Light-kun, there are pastries downstairs."

The brunette smiled softly, rolling his eyes. "Rather not, thanks, I'll grab something later, I can't keep my energy up on nothing but sugar."

The detective watched him for a moment. Then walked to an armchair by the dresser and perched there. "Perhaps Light-kun should go downstairs to get sustenance, the others will likely order food soon."

Light looked up, tossing the towel aside. "Hm, you're probably right. Besides, it'd be good to get out of this room for a while, get some fresh air."

He needed a moment alone anyway.

He walked to the door and paused, glancing back. "Are you coming?"

Just because he needed a moment, that doesn't mean L was going to give him one.

But surprisingly, L looked up at him and said plainly, "Light-kun has wiped my stamina. I need recuperation."

Light laughed quietly, his eyes softening. "Good to know you have a limit at all." He walked out and closed the door after him.

L listened to his footsteps fade, letting his eyes slide shut. After a moment, he opened them and rolled out of his chair, walking to the desk in the corner to push it aside just as Light had done. He picked up the corner of the carpet with two fingers and pulled it back to expose what was hidden beneath. The detective stared for a moment and picked the book up cautiously.

".... Hm."

L stood clumsily, unable to turn his eyes away from the thing in his hands. He opened it to the first page of white spiky writing. Then flipped to the next page, filled with Light's handwriting.

He sat down and pored over the hundreds of names until they all blurred together into a mass of ink and death.

---

When Light opened the door and slipped inside, L was sitting comfortably on the bed, and the room looked exactly as it had when he left. He walked to join him, forcing down a yawn. "Ah, everyone wants to socialize, as if there's nothing to do now that they know it's not me."

"Light-kun."

The brunette looked to the detective, running a hand through his hair to settling it back in place. "Yeah?"

L held both hands out and looked up at the younger man expectantly.

Light's brow furrowed in slight confusion, but he took the older man's hands anyway and was pulled down into L's arms. "I want to just hold Light-kun now."

.... Erm.... Was this... normal?

.... Why not, it was rather comfortable after all.

The brunette shrugged and settled onto L's chest. "Alright, I suppose... I'm tired anyway."

The arms around him tightened as the detective nuzzled into the crook of his neck. "... I'm not going to sleep for a while, but Light-kun should."

This was officially not normal.

Light nodded slightly, pushing out of L's grip to undress. "Alright. But you said you were tired earlier, you have to sleep sometime."

"I will, Light-kun. But I want to hold you more."

The younger man finished undressing quietly and pulled on his pajama pants before pulling the covers back and lying down. "Fine with me."

L followed suit, but as he got into bed, he pulled the younger man into his lap and leaned back on the headboard. "Is this comfortable?"

... He was comfortable. He was completely content, in fact, besides... Well...

Light's eyes flickered to the desk in the corner of the room. The new position had given him pause, but he relaxed into it anyway, leaning on the detective's pale chest. "Yeah, it's fine..." As he closed his eyes, he felt chapped lips brushing up and down his neck, kissing softly. He exhaled in a soft sigh and let his head fall to the side to bare more already bruised flesh. Wisps of hair ticked his collarbone as L nuzzled his shoulder, pressing his cold cheek to the heated skin of Light's neck to feel the smoothness and softness. Slowly, Light's breathing evened and he slipped into unconsciousness, his body going lax in the older man's hold.

L's lips twitched to the smallest smile against the murderers skin as he tightened his grip around him, his fingers playing idly with the soft flesh.


	14. Chapter 14

Oh my God, I actually posted when I said I would!! Well, no, I meant to post yesterday, but... hey, I gave you an extra page, so that's a good trade off, huh? Anyway, something terrible has happened, I can't login to my account! So guess what! My cohort/ minion/ bitch/ master is doing it for me, you get to hear from her for the first time ever! Say hi, Diligence!

Hi! Ima psycho! I been busy off rapin and pillagin for evers! So bai!

...And this is not satisfying Wrath at all, so...imagine I'm raping every one of you! (raperaperape) Wasn't that fun guys? Until next time!

.... This is why we can't have nice things.

Don't own Death Note, but I reeeeaaaally want it. Please? ... Why am I asking all of you? If you had it, you would do all the things I want to happen with it.

By the way, guys, I really want feedback on this chapter, I really really do, it's a damn important plot point. Diligence already told me it's good, but I'm paranoid and I'm not sure I did it justice, so even if you've never reviewed before, please just drop me a few words? Or... a lot more than a few words? Pretty please?

Ki11 me, Ki55 me

Hours later, the sun rose. The detective hadn't slept, but his grip had slackened slightly during the night, leaving the brunette with a little more breathing room. Still, when he woke, the first thing he did before even opening his eyes was to try to squirm out of the constriction. L watched him yawn and his saw the dull glow of his eyes sharpen. After a moment of calm, the elder broke the silence.

"... Light-kun is awake?"

The younger man nodded and rubbed his eyes, pushing softly against L's chest. "Mm..."

"... Light-kun is going to... go downstairs then?"

Light sat up, stretching his arms above his head. "Yeah, I got enough sleep, just give me a moment to get dressed."

After a short pause, arms wrapped around him again, pulling him back into an inescapable hold. "I want to hug Light-kun more, though."

Light started as the detective's cold fingertips brushed his skin and he laughed softly to cover up a faint but nagging uncertainty. "Shouldn't we get downstairs?"

Shouldn't you let go of me now?

"Why. The Kira case hasn't progressed any more since yesterday."

Thankfully.

"Exactly. That's why we should get down there and help."

Neither of them reacted when a giant spindly black shadow phased through the wall, but this time they could both see it.

L glanced away, his hands still loosely gripping the younger boy. "But... that would help little unless we didn't want to have sex with each other, and we do, right?"

Light felt his cheeks flush faintly at the prospect of... well, Ryuk was still in the room, and while that shouldn't really have bothered him anymore....

"... So early, L, I'm not even awake yet."

"If Light-kun doesn't want to, then perhaps he would be able to help with the case."

The younger man nodded. "I'd like to look over my files again, I'm sure there's a pattern I'm not seeing." He leaned against the detective, pecking his lips. "We'll come back up later."

".... Right." The pale arms slowly unwound and Light stood to redress, running a hand through his hair to settle it back in place. Silence permeated the room until L stood, walking to the brunette and wrapping his arms around him once more. Lips brushed the younger man's cheeks as their bodies were pressed flush.

"I love Light-kun."

.... No.... there was no way he... it was so damn unfair... he... he was lying, that was the only...

After a tense moment, Light turned, draping his arms around the detective's neck and pressing their lips together in a soft kiss. A terrible laugh made them both twitch.

"Couldn't say it back, could you, Light? Too closed off, maybe?"

L fisted his hands tightly in Light's shirt, pressing into the kiss almost roughly, brushing his tongue against the younger man's. Light closed his eyes and returned the kiss, letting the older man pull him closer.

Ryuk watched, still snickering at his private show. And then L's eyes snapped open, glaring at him so fiercely, his irises were nearly red as he pressed closer to the boy before him, biting the bruised lip a bit more aggressively than was strictly necessary.

The death god blinked, his smile falling for a moment. But as the seconds ticked by, his grin resurfaced, splitting his face as he gave L a gawky bow.

A moment later, L broke the kiss, his eyes back on the brunette. "Light-kun, will you go ahead? I have just a few more things to do."

Light blinked.

That was it? He was just.... Well, fair enough, he really should distance himself from L, at least until he decided what to do next.

He shrugged. "Fine. I'll tell the others you'll be down soon, we'll have all the files ready."

L watched Light slip out of his hold and cross the room to pull his normal jacket on and walk out. The detective stared after him, perfectly still for a moment.

After the soft footsteps had faded, he walked back to the desk, pulling it aside to retrieve the thing beneath it. As he held it up, he heard a rasping chuckle and that voice floated from behind him.

"So, you finally found it, did you, Lawliet? Finally caught him?"

He stood, folding the book down the middle and pushing it into the waistband of his jeans. He adjusted his white shirt to cover the black and looked up at the plain white wall in front of him "Do shinigami force it on humans, or do humans take it by choice?"

"Light took it with _hunger_. Once he understood that it was real, it was his life."

"You said something about memories. What was that referring to?"

Ryuk snickered, perching on the bedpost. "So you _were_ listening. I think Light's lost his touch since I took his memory. Normally he wouldn't have so much as glanced at me while in this building, but I guess he put too much store in the idea that you no longer suspected him."

The wires of L's brain sparked for a moment and he nodded. "When did he lose his memory?"

"He asked me to take it. Right after he was handcuffed to you, and he asked me to return it when suspicion was lessened. I'm sure you can guess which moment I picked."

L barely suppressed an eyeroll. He should have inferred that though, it made sense. "That was very selfish of you. Though I'm certain you don't care." He sighed softly, and walked to the door, down the long hallway to a beautiful young man he'd spent the last few days with.

The thing had followed him all the way down and announced his presence by flying to his partner, standing behind the brunette's right shoulder. "What? You didn't want to put on another show this morning? He sure did."

Damn perverted god of death. The shinigami realm needed cable or something, maybe then they'd spend less time getting their amusement from the human race.

Light twitched, glancing up at L. "Ryuzaki. Everything is laid out, but nothing jumps out yet. I asked Mogi to get the data from the last few days, since we didn't have a chance to look it over."

L walked to his own chair and perched. "... Is there anything else that might be of use?"

Light looked away, his eyes flitting over the computer screen. "I can't say yet, I'm still looking over everything here."

The detective kept watching him. ".... Light-kun, are you sure there's nothing else you know that would help us catch Kira?"

....

The brunette blinked, turning from his computer to look at the older man. ".... No, I just told you, I'm still looking through things." His eyes strayed just for a second to look at Ryuk's face.

"Light, are you Kira?"

His breath caught in his throat.

Ryuk burst out laughing.

He looked to L slowly and there was a flash of understanding that no one else in the room seemed to catch.

A second later, Matsuda chuckled softly. "L, you can't just go back to that, we all agreed that Light was innocent-"

The detective pulled the notebook from his clothes and set it down gently on the table between them.

Light's eyes widened.

The room was quiet.

After a moment, the young man swallowed, wetting his dry lips. He stood smoothly, turned his back to the detective and crossed his wrists behind his back.

He lost.

And L was able to keep his word. Arresting Kira even when...

Cold metal snapped around his wrists and the older man stood. "... Matsuda-san, please order a police car to come and take Yagami-kun to the police station."

"Please, L. My real name."

"... Yes, Light."

Light laughed softly, his eyes straying to Matsuda who was completely catatonic, his mouth hanging open. "You know I didn't mean _that one_."

Behind them, someone finally unfroze long enough to dial for the car.

"... It is... not custom to call a person by their public name."

"Believe me, it's the name everyone will remember."

Just say my name... my real one... you deserve to after all this time...

Ryuk laughed, swooping down to the two unfortunate young men before him. "Aw, how sweet! You don't want to be reminded that he's a mass murderer, do you? Such a devoted lover."

L and Light shared an angry twitch as the younger's eyes narrowed and he hissed softly, "Stay out of this, before too long, you'll be the one to kill me, let me have peace until then."

A black car with tinted windows pulled up outside.

"... Let's go, Light."

He let the detective guide him forward, his back straight and his head high as he walked. "Please, L, you've earned the right to say my real name to my face." They walked outside.

"I will be there for your execution." The detective opened the car door.

Light sighed softly, turning to face the other. "I am Kira, L."

L looked down and said nothing. After a long moment, Light's lips curved to a small smile and he slid gracefully into the car and watched the sky as the door was closed on him.

---

Light sat in a holding cell. They most definitely were not expecting to catch him like this.

The great Kira?

A student barely out of high school?

And such a decent and good-looking boy?

Ridiculous.

Then again, _he_ wasn't expecting to be caught like this. It was so surreal... He had no one to blame but himself, of course, placing so much blind trust in the detective's word when he said he was no longer a suspect.

He had no idea why he believed him... There was really no reason. Oh well. Why dwell on it now, when there was nothing to be done?

"Hey, hey, Light."

He looked up to watch his death god float through the wall into his cell.

Ryuk looked around outside the temporary cell. "Every single one of these guys is terrified of you. Minutes keep dropping off their life spans."

The brunette's thin brow rose. "... Then I've done my job."

The demon cackled, flying around the small room in a tight circle. "So, Light, how're you gonna get out of this one, huh? You gonna kill the guard? You could trade for the eyes, you know, there's still time. Ooh, maybe you could kill the detective when he comes to your execution. That'd be a pretty cool finale, don't you think? Or maybe kill everyone in the place so that you're still Kira going out? Or maybe... you could make someone bring me apples as a final act! That would be really nice, you know."

As Ryuk rambled, Light slipped a hand into his jacket.

They had checked him for weapons as he was escorted in, of course, but they were so panicky, so afraid – no one knew how he did it yet – that they wouldn't check for something so small and insignificant as a folded slip of paper and a small pen in the inner lining of his jacket.

Their loss.

He unfolded the plain sheet of paper and began to write.

Hardly a second later, the death god was peering over his shoulder. "Ooh, Light, watcha – Hey."

The young man looked up, glaring venomously. "I can't help but noticing that it isn't working."

Apparently 'Ryuk' wasn't his real name. Either that or the death note doesn't work on its original owner.

Said owner chuckled, flying back up. "Nah, that'd be cheating, wouldn't it? Why're you so pissed at me, Light? I didn't put you here."

Light felt his teeth grit, his words coming out more as a growl. "I've been pissed at you since you showed me that you'd been watching me with L." The pen in his hand moved smoothly across the precious page before him, slowly filling it with the names he'd memorized days before.

He was caught, but dammit, he was not done.

The death god chuckled. "That so? Couldn't be a connection there, could there?"

Connection, what connection?

"You were watching me having sex, and you just had to give my memories back at that specific _moment_!"

A few cells away, a man screamed and a body hit the floor. The guards screamed, running to the corpse and sparing the murderer at fault a fearful glance.

"Light, you're so closed off, you couldn't even tell him you love him! Heh, and you think you're pissed at me for being a lech? Not much can get you off your game like this for so long."

"You completely ruined the moment, just when I had adjusted to the new way he was acting!"

Ryuk flew through the bars to watch the guards panic." 'Adjusted'? You were already used to him a long time before I came in. Still doesn't explain why you're acting all psycho."

One brave man walked to the bars –unknowingly passing through the shinigami to do so – and banged loudly on the bars. "Hey! I'm not afraid of you, Kira, you're just another criminal being held by the law, I know it's you, so knock it off!!"

'Knock it off?' 'Knock off' making the world better, stupid people; they don't know what's best for them.

He deigned the man with a disapproving glance, saying coolly, "Do you mind, I'm trying to get a moment's peace." He looked back to the page in his hand, muttering under his breath, more to himself than the guard or demon. "I'm pissed because... because..."

In a way, Ryuk had a point. Sure, the moment had been embarrassing, but he was still... bothered by it, why was that? With everything that happened, everything that he'd lost in the last few hours...

Lost? Where did that come from, he had only lost one thing, his freedom, why did he think in the plural?

... It's not like he had lost anything else, really.

"No."

Had he just said that out loud?

The death god perked. "Hm? I think something interesting just happened in that brain of yours, Light-"

"Hey! What's with you! If the killings don't stop here, I'm coming in there personally!"

Idiot man.

Light looked up, his eyes narrowed. "Leave me alone." He went back to his work, but he did switch the category of names to people he knew were outside of this prison.

Ryuk flew in close to the young man, mouth torn in a wide grin. "Ooh, did Light just have an epiphany? Sounded like it, come on, Light, tell me."

"Leave me alone, you get to _kill_ me tomorrow, why won't you just leave me alone till then!!"

He was so tired of this, so utterly bored and exhausted of it all...

The death god's wide eyes flickered up to the glowing numbers over his head. "Bold statement there, Light. I'd like a peek into that brain of yours sometime, seems like it'd be damn entertaining. For about five minutes."

Light looked up, glaring icily. "Stop looking at my lifespan." He went back to writing, thinking aloud, "God, I wish you had never given me my..."

His eyes widened.

"... my memories..."

He paled.

"... back..."

I wish I didn't remember.

A moment's pause.

".... Now _there's_ that epiphany." Ryuk cackled. "Betcha regret not giving up your memories before now, huh?"

The young man completely ignored him, his eyes staring blankly at the paper, now half filled with people recently dead. "... I was happier. When I didn't know..."

His eyes were stinging in an almost unfamiliar way.

He... was crying? Over... _this_, something so...

The guard's brow furrowed as he moved closer to the bars, ".... Kira?" He watched the young man drop the paper and pen and lower his face into his hand, massaging his temple – his breathing gradually speeding up even as he tried to calm himself. "Hey, Kira! What's with the psycho act?"

Light tensed and his teeth gritted. "Leave me alone!!"

"You're the one who killed thousands! Don't act like you get last wishes!"

The brunette looked up, his eyes narrowed. "Don't make me push the number higher. You'd be dead within a minute."

"I'd be honored to be one of the only truly innocent people to be killed by Kira! Go ahead and try it!"

Finally, the other guards noticed, running to the idiot man's side to calm him and pull him away from the danger he was now provoking.

Light's lips curved to a soft smile, an utterly humorless laugh forcing it's way from his lips. "You know I won't. I only kill the wicked." His eyes hardened. "But you also know I _could._"

He was pulled away, the other guards still watching Light fearfully as if he were something as terrible as a death god himself. One long moment later, he sighed softly, looking down to the floor. Moving mechanically, he moved to pick up the pen and paper and sat back, his body relaxing slowly. A moment later, he continued, as he always had been, numbly writing name, after name... after name...


	15. Chapter 15

Ki11 me, Ki55 me

L was sitting on his bed, his toes playing with the still rumpled and unmade sheets below him, his laptop settled in the center of a mattress completely surrounded by papers. He held the Death Note loosely in his hands, taking care to check each name against the list of those who had died. When a rough voice sounded from behind him, he managed to almost entirely suppress his shiver.

"There's no need to check, Lawliet. They're all dead."

After a moment of complete silence, the detective sighed, closing his laptop and setting the notebook down on top. "There is a two percent chance of you getting the Hell out of my room, Mr. Shinigami. I do not like that."

Ryuk laughed, peering over his shoulder at the pieces of paper scattered around. "A whole two percent? Wow. You know, I assumed that little quirk of giving everything percentages was just to annoy Light."

"Do you mind?" The man shifted, piling his notes together and pushing them out of view. "This is still very sensitive evidence, Mr. Shinigami. Why did you come here, anyway? Shouldn't you be harassing Light like you usually do?"

"Ha! Even if it is sensitive evidence, who will I tell? Only you and Light can see me. And a handful of dead humans. As for why I'm not hanging around Light," the spindly thing shrugged its shoulders awkwardly. "He's being all boring and melancholy."

"Hm, and I expected him to be having a grand old time in his cell. Are you done?"

"You kidding? I'm not done making you feel immeasurably worse. He looked numb when I left, I think he was starting to cry." The death god just laughed, twisting in the air. "Never thought I'd see the day, you know?"

L was silent for a moment before he glanced up. ".... I have a hard time imagining Light-k... Light cry. Forgive my skepticism."

Ryuk shrugged, watching the man below him. "Didn't say he was crying. Just that it looked like he would. Odd, isn't it? I should have hung around and got pictures, no one will believe me even if I _could_ tell them."

The detective scoffed softly. "And I thought you death gods had a television to see the human world. Couldn't you look at him anytime you wished?"

"Of course I can. I thought I'd be nice for a change and give him a chance to compose himself. Build his mental and emotional walls back up."

"... I suppose those are the same walls that supposedly stopped him from telling me..."

Ryuk's smile widened.

L reopened his laptop. "If those words were ever there anyway. There's no reason to even be saying this now, let alone to a Shinigami."

The death god burst out in raucous laughter, wandering around the room in his boredom. "What do you mean, 'let alone to a Shinigami!' You have to tell these things to someone and it might as well be someone who can't put them in jail for them! Ha, you really are quite the head case, almost as bad as Light!"

"Why do you say that? Because I'm talking to something that shouldn't technically be here?"

"Because you're in love with a murderer. Because you're agonizing over whether or not he loves you back. Because you want him so much that in the back of your mind, you're using your genius to try to figure out how to get Light out alive. Because you're still hoping secretly that you'll end up together. Any of those problems you could talk over with a normal shrink?"

L stayed perfectly still, his eyes still glued on the weapon lying innocently in his hands. "The Shinigami has made several good points. But do they merit a conversation that could potentially destroy my resolve to carry out my duty to justice by keeping a mass murderer to his execution date?"

Ryuk grinned. "Maybe they do. But I bet your brain would enjoy the challenge of figuring out how you could do it though."

....

A small smirk curved pale lips. "The Shinigami has an even better point."

---

Light walked slowly to the center of a large arena-like area, his face blank and his eyes calm. He had tuned everything out, the quiet muttering of the scientists waiting for him, the screams of his supporters as they strained against the doors in almost hysterical grief, even L's stare on him...

He sighed softly, glancing around the large area lazily. "Lethal injection... doesn't seem very fitting... going out with a whimper instead of a bang." His eyes locked with the detective's.

He was settled a ways away from the gleaming metal gurney and heart monitor, his hand gripping his knee tightly. The moment they saw each other, however, L looked away, sucking a dark purple lollipop.

Light let out a soft breath somewhere between a scoff and a laugh and he looked away, up to the sky. "I do wonder where I'll go..." He shrugged, closing his eyes. "Oh well."

He didn't care. Really. He didn't.

There were two IV lines on either side of his deathbed, each bag filled with a simple saline solution. He knew this procedure, knew it by heart, though he could not remember when or why he had memorized it.

First, Sodium thiopental, to render him unconscious, this would take only a few seconds.

Second, Pancuronium, to paralyze his muscles and ensure there was no possible way for him to jar the needle.

And then... lastly. Potassium chloride. It would stop his heart within seven minutes.

Honestly, how wonderfully ironic was it that he was to be killed by a drug that induced cardiac arrest?

"Neither Heaven or Hell, Light." Ryuk grinned. "And I'll be pulling the trigger, as it were."

... The cause of death was handy, really, as no one would notice the difference.

He rolled his eyes, saying softly, "I remember, Ryuk, you don't need to say it so cheerfully." He looked away.

He shouldn't have. If he had kept watching, he would have seen the death god's eyes dart to his life span. And he might have even guessed why he started laughing again as the last things were being put in place.

And then L stood and walked to him. He was holding a microphone in his hand, but he didn't offer it. "Do you have a final statement, Light?"

Oh, that's just want he wanted, to make this even _more_ public, as if the mob begging for his release wasn't enough.

The brunette grimaced slightly. "Please don't."

... Oh, come on, just do it.

"... But I suppose I do have something that needs to be said." He took a step forward, thankful that the detective didn't move away. Their chests were almost touching as Light spoke softly, almost directly into L's ear. "Congratulations. I knew if I was going to be stopped by someone, it would be you. You were right."

He turned his head slightly, warm lips brushing against the older man's cold skin. "And I do love you, L..."

Why not. He was going to die within the hour anyway.

And then Ryuk burst out laughing.

And L held up an arm behind his back, a small remote in his hand as he whispered back, "That was the right answer."

He pressed the button.

He gate holding his supporters back exploded.

Light's eyes widened as his body completely tensed.

There was a moment of stunned silence. And then people poured into the room, swallowing every scientist and every guard as they circled around them, making a protective ring and filling the room with a deafening roar of sound.

The younger man turned on the spot, his mouth falling half open. "N- No, what the Hell-??" He caught occasional glimpses of the task force members trying to fight their way through the crowd, but they were repeatedly pushed back.

L's arms wrapped around him. "Light, I told you I love you, and I do. But I lied when I said I would turn you in if you were Kira. It seems I am as imperfect as you." Then he felt his legs swept out from under him as he was lifted off his feet.

L... was.... carrying him. Through the crowd and towards the doors, completely ignoring the Shinigami who was rolling around in midair, laughing so hard he cried.

Light thrashed in the strong grip, his eyes wide and panicky. "PUT ME DOWN, PUT ME DOWN, WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!!"

The death god followed them, hardly able to speak through his laughter. "I officially love humans!!"

The detective ignored him, almost running to the parking lot and shoving him into the backseat of a shiny black car, calling to the elderly man in the driver's seat, "Watari-san, if you would kindly drive!"

"Right away, sir." A second later, they were weaving wildly and expertly through traffic.

Light finally managed to face L again, struggling desperately against the shackles biting into his wrists. "What the fuck is going on here, what the fuck are you doing, how the fuck did you get me out of there, where the fuck are we going, why the fuck did you pick me up!!"

"I am kidnapping you so that you will not be killed, Watari is driving because I had to blow up the gate so that your fans would protect us, I set the bomb earlier because no one would suspect that L would try to break Kira out, we are going to the Whammy House because it is the only place the police won't be able to find or search for us, and I picked you up because you would never move otherwise until I explained what was going on and we needed the seconds it would take to do that in order to escape."

Oh. Well that made _perfect_ sense- WHAT THE HELL WAS THIS IDIOT GENIUS THINKING!!

Watari spoke in a kind tone from the front seat, still dodging around cars. "Yagami-kun, you will find Whammy's House's accommodations most fitting, I believe. L has been watching you for a while, you know, and thus is aware of your particular tastes."

His bronze eyes widened as his mind desperately tried to process what had happened to him in the last five minutes. "Whammy's House?! Wait a second, you've been _waiting for this_?! How the hell- RYUK!" He glanced around for the demon, intending to ask him exactly what in God's name was going on.

"I apologize for this, Light-kun, but there are few other options because you're not calming down."

A sharp pain blossomed across his temple and he immediately saw his vision blur and darken until everything went black.

As his body went lax, he distantly heard the familiar grating laugh.

* * *

Heh, you guys didn't _really_ think I'd kill off Light, did you? But I bet I had you going for a while, huh?

Okay, now for the bad thing. This chapter is short. Intolerably short. Inexcusably short. I am fully aware of this, I promise you, and I am dreadfully sorry. I tried to write more, honest I did, but... come on, the chapter's over there, adding on more would just take away from the effect. But I don't want to leave you guys with just that, so I'm adding on a preview for my next oneshot. It's NearMello, _kind of_, it has MattMello too. If you like NearMello, I think you... heh, _may _like it, if you don't... you may like it even more. It should be posted in full within the next week.

I don't own Death Note, uh... I don't own... the blanket industry? I don't own... True Blood? I've only watched one episode of it, and it already seems like a Twilight homage. It's freaking me out.

* * *

4 P0551b1l1+y

It was so obvious that they would fall in love; even at so young, everyone could see it. And Near disliked it. He disliked that everyone assumed that Matt and Mello could be for each other alone. Why couldn't they be for other people?

Well, Mello anyway.

Near first noticed his interest one uneventful day in fall. He was inside, naturally. He had always been weak physically, and he didn't care much for playing outside, so he had neither the capabilities nor the desire to run around on the grounds like Mello and the other boys did. But that particular day, he happened to have situated himself by a tall window with a large bucket of white, gray and black legos at his side and a half completed model of the Coliseum before him. It was pure chance that he glanced out the window just in time to see a frenzied Matt chase Mello by. This frenzy likely had to do with the gameboy held tightly in Mello's hand. The blond curved sharply around a tree looked over his shoulder and gave the redhead a soft smile.

In one second, the dark red and orange leaves of the tree above them were tossed aside by a breeze and in that moment, Mello was beautiful. And in that moment, Near wanted him, wanted that look for himself. The sunlight faded as quickly as it had come, but the want remained.

---

The next few months were devoted to watching, an observational study of a being who was nothing like him. Within days, he memorized the way Mello moved, the way he ate chocolate, the way he laughed. Near found he liked it when Mello laughed, it made him softer, more human, the way his normally icy eyes danced and his lips curled to a smirk that could have rivaled the Mona Lisa in its ambiguity. But when he _really_ laughed, it was even better. Like the time Matt fell in the small pond on the grounds. He had been running to catch a ball Mello had tossed him and ended up tripping and falling face-first into the water. When he walked out, his shoulders drooping, water dripping from his hair and his face set in a heartbreaking pout; he looked every bit like the puppy he acted like. Mello had laughed so hard he cried, tears collecting in the corner of his eyes as he almost collapsed to the grass, clutching his sides.

Near had actually felt his mouth curve to a small smile. What he considered a smile, anyway. From then on, he found it got increasingly difficult to _not_ show visible interest around Mello. When the blond walked into the room minutes later, still giggling, with Matt trotting at his heels, he had to keep his head down, his body hunched and his eyes on the Coliseum. The two boys seemed to overlook his presence, so he sat still and listened closely.

"Jesus, that was amazing, I will never let you forget that!" A soft fwump and the shifting of clothe revealed the older had tossed a towel from the closet to his companion.

Matt's voice joined him, shaky as he fought against the cold that permeated more than his clothes. "Yeah. I bet. But you didn't have to laugh quite that hard, you jerk." There were two wet squeaks from the soles of Matt's shoes as he kicked them off.

The blonde's low chuckle filled the room, and Near could picture the older boy's devilish smile and playful cobalt eyes watching the redhead. "Oh, I really did. Come on, let's go so you can change, you look ridiculous just standing there shivering."

"... You're mean." Their footsteps retreated to the door and Near looked up in time to see golden hair whip around the corner.

"You love me for it."

And at this point, everybody knew that. Of course Matt was in love with Mello, that was just the nature of things, wasn't it. All of the problems stemmed from the day Near realized that be might be too.


End file.
